Fleur de Lis

University Chorale Fall 2011

2012-01-01T15:05:00.000-08:00

Along with teaching Sight Singing, assisting in BYU's Women's Chorus, conducting Stake Choir, singing with the SCO Renaissance Choir, accompanying and singing in BYU Singers, I teach and conduct University Chorale. and I love it.

1st miracle. Lorie, in the teal and white. I foolishly didn't order professor copies of the music that the bookstore ordered, so I went to the bookstore to buy my own copies of the music. Well, I went to check out, and the my cashier said that she had seen so many students check out with this music and it looked so wonderful-- what was included in the packet? I told her all about it, and that I conducted this group. She was so interested, and for some reason, I felt like I should invite her to sing with us. So I did. She joined our choir and was a wonderful addition for the alto section as well as the girls around her. She was such a positive support to me the whole semester long, I could hardly look her way without smiling. She so enjoyed singing with us, and her joy was contagious.

Second miracle. Missionaries. About a dozen students in Chorale received their mission calls this semester or are actively awaiting them to go off into the world serving the Lord. I was so grateful that they sang with us while preparing to leave. There are so many opportunities to testify through song in Chorale as well as on missions. Joe, playing the reorder here, is one of those awaiting his call to serve. He plays a dozen instruments and was so positive in his support of choir. We sang for a devotional when Elder Callister spoke, and he brought a book to be signed by this general authority as he spoke to us. Elder Callister willingly complied and I was so impressed by Joe's bright faith and excitement as he prepared to serve the Lord.

One last picture from our concert, conducting Handel's The Many Rend the Skies from Alexander's Feast. We are just starting up again for another semester where I can be more organized, more musical, more enthusiastic, more planned and more faithful.

Filled

2011-12-24T00:12:00.000-08:00

Filled with Carols, both felt and sung
Filled with twinkling of the candles & stars
Filled with smells of spices and Warmth
Filled with feasts of Words and of bread
Filled with favorite stories of renewal and good will
Filled with the Joy of human's love
Filled with the Spirit so palpable, I cry

Filled with a heart swelling as great as this world
Filled with Love from the dear ones nearby
Filled with Thanks for comforts and rest
Filled with admiration for Joseph, now 206!
Filled with inspiration to do better and be more--
Filled with Song. Hope, and Joy.
Filled with family's laughter and Trust
Filled with surprises & anticipation for what's next
Filled with memories to make any lifetime content
Filled with traditions, both old and the new
Filled with newness, lists and goals
Filled with empathy for those feeling remorse
Filled with courage to start again, persevere
Filled with Giving, sharing, partaking
Filled with a mind, open for increase
Filled with thoughts I could ponder for years
Filled with Charity. Serenity, Peace.
Filled with fresh Vision from the True guide
Filled with recognition of what's given and required
Filled with humility for particular gifts of Light
Filled with Faith and engendered confidence
Filled with Desires so deeply rooted in my core
Filled with Emotion, Christ-like and human
Filled with Wonder, awe and cheers
Filled with Gloria's, praising God above
Filled with Rejoicing for goodness imparted to me
Filled with astonishment at how far these feelings reach...

Memories and traditions from the past, Love and serenity in the moment, and awaiting the brightest future... This is how I feel today.

Merry, Merry, Merry Christmas.

Overwhelmed

2011-09-22T21:46:00.000-07:00

I'd already sung several songs with BYU Singers and even played on the 10 ft Fazioli that BYU's trying out but I had not been nervous beforehand. For a moment, I was alone in a forgotten corridor of the H-FAC and said another prayer... Father, I don't deserve this. I don't deserve this honor. but please help me. Concert Choir was filing off stage, and I could hear the risers creaking with Women's Chorus members milling into place. It seemed like forever until the creaking and clapping stopped and it was my turn to walk on. First the accompanist, then me, then Jean Applonie. I bowed with my mentor and then stepped onto the podium.

Being in the middle of the de Jong concert hall stage was not intimidating whatsoever, but I could never have been prepared for what I saw next. I looked up and saw 185 beautiful women, shining... their sparkly tops, their bright faces, their eyes full of anticipation for their part of the concert and their minds focused on each reminder... bright red smiles of people I love. and so I raised my hands. Overwhelmed.

I was full of energy, hopefully channeling it into my conducting and to the girls I work with. Elbows up a little farther. look into their faces-- JOY! then slow down, flexible wrist. the meaning of the piece. and more joy. and it was over. I just looked at them.

I must have smiled (how could I not?) but forgot completely what I was supposed to do for a moment. The hall was full of applause, so I stepped down from my pedestal and motioned a hand to recognize the beautiful singers and bowed. They are glorious.

The last number of the concert was sung with all of the combined choirs and I was lucky enough to accompany them 'Of the Father's Love Begotten.' Dr. Staheli always motions for me to stand before he even turns around (perhaps it makes up for so many invisible accompanists) and when he does, it is so easy to smile at the audience. especially after knowing and loving one more choir.

San Francisco

2011-08-28T20:52:00.000-07:00

Concert Series at the Presidio, San Francisco Debut

Debussy:
l'Isle joyeuse
Reflets dans l'eau

Poulenc:
Napoli Suite
Barcarolle
Nocturne
Italian Caprice (intermission)

Ravel: Ondine
Chopin: Nocturne Op. 27.2
Prokofiev: Sonata #1

The clapping was enthusiastic at the end of the Prokofiev both nights, and many were standing. On Friday night, an older gentleman in the audience ran up to present me with a handful of beautiful wildflowers! So, I gave an encore:

Marciack
Île St. Louis from Impressions de Paris

This was the last piece that I studied with Monsieur Marciack in Paris. He composed two books of "Impressions de Paris" for his students to play. He cried at one of the last performances I gave while studying with him, and I wondered, 'why would someone cry to music?' Although I studied another one or two of his works with Christina Van Dohm in Antwerp, I put the books away when I moved to Wisconsin. For some reason, I packed them with me when I went off to College (not sure what I was thinking) and found them again when I was living with my Grandmother during the Spring term.

I looked through the pieces, and was reminded of many early musical memories associated with Monsieur Marciack, his handwriting, his music, his mannerisms, his laugh, his love for me... and then I played through the Île St Louis. I started to cry at the end of the first line and cried during the whole piece. It reminded me of everything that was Paris, everything that I learned musically there, every pain I had felt leaving, and every pain I had felt there. I was reminded of how many 'weird' things I did that were simply cross-culture conflicts and how much I loved Paris, Music, Monsieur Marciack, and how blessed I was to have all of those things.

After each performance, the audience greeted and congratulated me in the foyer and to my surprise, I noted accents (especially European) from the majority of the audience members. They thought that Marian Marciack might have been a famous French folk song, Schumann, a Song without Words, MacDowell or Gottschalk... he would be flattered. Others told me they felt it was my prayer. It was.

Liz Olson, my best friend from High School surprised me by attending both concerts and took me out to see her favorite spots in San Francisco, favorite roads, favorite ice cream place, and favorite real San Fransiscan restaurant. She and many other audience members asked when I would be coming back? soon in any case. If this was a 'debut,' that simply means 'beginning' (it's french, of course). So I will return. with friends. and perhaps more musical instruments. ;) see you then.

meeting Kirk Richards

2011-08-21T12:53:00.000-07:00

BYU's Museum of Art has always been one of my favorite places. To meditate, to enjoy great artists, to have stimulating conversations with tour guides, to sing, to play the piano, to eat...

The first exhibit that I attended repeatedly and even obsessively was entitled Beholding Salvation. The ten minute changing period between classes in the H-FAC would give me at least five minutes in the MOA. That is when I first encountered Kirk Richards. His painting Gethsemane captured and held my attention so much--perhaps that is why I had to return so often. But even upon returning, I'd spend a bulk of my time in front of that painting.

So many pictures of the atonement show Christ suffering at a tree, but rarely do I feel his pain and see the blood he shed. Layers of red, brown, gold, and sin slapped onto the canvas screamed of His emotion. His suffering. and the saving angel rising up in white sang of such comfort. The exhibit also carried his Baptism of Christ, another favorite of the exhibit.

Lisa, my good friend and tour guide had invited me to the opening gala and mentioned that Kirk Richards had been there, but alas, I had not had the good fortune of meeting him there.

well, several years later, he came back to BYU for campus education week. I of course bought an affordable (for a starving musician) little Gethsemane print (the texturing of the oil is of course lost, but it will always remind me of the original) as well as several postcards of his work, and shook his hand. What an honor! He took the time to to ask me about myself, my life and dreams and accepted my compliments congenially and graciously.

While looking at the few originals and prints in the Bookstore, an older woman started a conversation with me. She took such interest in my connections to BYU Singers, to music, to Palo Alto, to Wisconsin, to Paris, to redheads... and then asked, 'have you eaten yet?' well no... 'how about I treat you to dinner!' Of course she wouldn't accept a 'no' for a drink or fries but invited her husband and oldest son to come join us the the cougar eat and talk with me.

However unexpected the encounter was, and however moving the art was, my education week finished with me thinking how there are so many wonderful people in the world.

Belonging

2011-08-11T20:41:00.000-07:00

One of the reasons I love france so much is that so much of me grew up there--despite my American blood and nationality, I will always feel that I belong.

Real friends that are excited about my passions make me feel like I belong.

There are 134 operating temples for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (not including the temple announced for Paris, FRANCE!); and yet, when I went to work on my shift yesterday with the kindest ladies in white of the Wednesday 3B session in the Provo, Utah temple, I just felt a rush of comfort, of home, of happiness. It is there I belong.

I just signed a real contract for fall / winter semesters at a big, lovely place and feel so happy having included God in the decision-making process, having made a decision, and having come to terms with each part of the decision. I finally have a wonderful roommate, a place to live, to work out, and a ward where I can belong.

Freeing up my conducting this summer with Dr. Shapiro has given me great leave to 'create' more than ever. I finally feel that I really belong in front of a choir or orchestra.

Today might have been the first time in my life that I listened to a radio station by myself other than a classical station. It was liberating. and it wasn't bad music either. I was happy being myself and didn't change the radio station right away. I like who I am, I love my fetish with classical, modern classical, musical theatre, and jazz--but I can listen to whatever I want in the moment. My tastes are a part with me. and I belong in who I am.

The day started with biking around Hobble Creek, and ended with driving back up the canyon to the setting sun. It was behind the mountains when I got here, but the moon was just rising. I put down my things and ran outside. The moon was shining exactly upon my balcony. and the sun has kept the earth warm enough for my bare feet. I of course ran down the stairs, and around the yard, singing to my heart's content with the trees and curtsying to the stars coming out. I twirled as the breeze brushed through my hair and the wildflowers bid their goodnight. I couldn't stop smiling. I feel loved and I belong.

I best be off to the Fazioli for a Chopin nocturne tonight. yes, I belong there too.

Underground Parisian Music

2011-08-02T21:28:00.000-07:00

When we’re not above ground getting live performances, there’s always more underground—the metros are full of musicians. Most of them can’t really play, but every now and then there’s a Great accordion player, or the Navaho-looking guy who plays several different types of South American flutes with percussion accompaniment. And I give money to any of them more often than I do the other beggars. On this trip, most of the metro instrumentalists I heard were violinists… and I was not impressed with one of them (all pickiness aside. Honestly). Disappointment. Ah well.

But there’s not only Metros in the underground.

It’s going into the jazz piano bars with the gypsy guitarists with their fellow accordion and bass players. Never seen such quick guitar fingering. And jazz is always better in a crowded, smoky dark room late at night. By far the best quality music you can find in the underground.

And then underneath the bridges and along the seine, there are groups of friends who come together with dozens of instruments to throw folk songs together, dancing, clapping, singing and playing. Most of them needed work (especially the clarinetist…) but it never detracted because of the ambiance. It was so much fun to on the quai with them, and so often that is what music needs to be about—a good time.

respite in sound

2011-08-02T11:53:00.000-07:00

I’d been sitting in an airport for a extra day now, but when I started walking down the left aisle to my seat, scanning both letters and numbers for 30J—I heard it. I don’t think that it was possible that I could have been as happily distracted hearing or doing anything else.

Solfège (fixed do) automatically started in my head—several different voices at the same time during a gamelon-like-rhythmic section. The hanging or ghost tones in the melody (as it morphs through timbre) kept on being picked up by the strings’ harmonies as Phillip Lasser taught us. The cello and bass ‘do’ to ‘sol dieze‘ and back again automatically kept my conducting hand steady. I heard Bach and Brahms’s counterpoint without their progression. five-tuplets in the harp while feeling the triplets in my eyes. And then the recapitulation wasn’t a perfect repeat as it left out the diminished ninth. Cuing! to the horns, then the clarinet.

It is Debussy. Prélude à l’après-midi d’un faune.

what a beauty.

Hannahbel

2011-08-01T15:10:00.000-07:00

~ Sisters ~

Yes, we had to go half way around the world to see one another, but we overlapped a whole week in Paris. the days of babysitting, and driving and holing the 'little girls' hands down to disneyland are now meeting up after flying alone internationally alone and ready to explore in the big city.

so she stayed out with me and my friends to experience the 'night life' of paris. Walking across the Seine at night, seeing the Eiffel sparkle at midnight, getting the after-concert Berthillion or Amarino or Hagen Daas. Of course she was adored by all the EAMA students, and came to several of our concerts. She was my biggest supporter, that's for sure. and while I sung Sunny's songs to open the last concert, It was wonderful to look straight at her in the middle of Salle Franck.

yes, the Opera house quarter is one of my favorites, and Hannah and I walked around for quite some time (right by the big APPLE store, yeay!), got several postcards took this beautiful lunch (wouldn't think we got the very cheapest stuff on the menu: this is a pumpernickel bread sandwich with large amounts of Chevre, some greens, figues, and spiced onions (curry and possibly saffron?). it was beautiful.

And what is a trip to Paris without Angelinas? We woke up early and walked along the seine by the Louvre to share a hot chocolate while I looked over my counterpoint and conducting homework for the day (waiter really liked that actually)

Hannah I miss you already! Thanks for so many great times!

Dr. Shapiro & faculty

2011-08-01T15:00:00.000-07:00

A Stained-Glass Window

2011-07-21T13:56:00.000-07:00

I followed Karen Kimmett upstairs to a small chapel I'd never seen before. Even at 8, I was enamored with architecture and the little stained-glass window in the corner enthralled me. My mother had accompanied me to this rescheduled violin lesson by car (usually I went by metro with the au pair) and we drove through down-town Paris during the sunset. Having seen it so long from the underground, my awe was pricked by my mothers excitement already--what a special day! And since it was so late, the conservatory was quite empty, just awaiting adventure.

Now that the setting was right, she had me play again. A part of such beauty, I was moved by the music. She'd paint another picture, and I would play again. And to a French schoolgirl to whom compliments are banned, she kept smiling and said (in her french canadian accent), 'we should play all night, you just get better and better!'

Today I was again moved by music. I had prepared the Brahms 'O Heiland reiss die Himmel auf' intellectually, musically, technically--I'd memorized the translations and held a vision of what I wanted it to sound like. But Dr. Shapiro knew that I was not where I really wanted to be. He reminded me of the musical skills, the solfege, and the hearing that were quite natural to me. He spoke of various dilemmas with other students which I did not have-- 'I still don't know why you want to hold something back.' Back to being an actress. How would you address God in a song like this?

I showed him, and then blurted out, 'but I can't possibly do that while I conduct!' but I already knew I only had to go there in my spirit (French word for mind = esprit; same as spirit). So I thought back to the times in greatest distress when I have called for Heaven to break open and for God to extend his Almighty hand to help me. and so we worked the music, over and over again. Hearing texture, chord color, register and entrances instead of beats or bars. Trying to express true music.

There were only a handful of minutes left in Chorale (required for all students at EAMA), but he hadn't forgotten about me--Brahms, everyone! May I present to you Mariah Wilson.

We only had time for the first section, but it was beautiful. I received the music, and realized that I was prepared. It really was beautiful. I sang along to both the soprano and alto parts perfectly in my head, cued each entrance and pled with the Lord. Before we did it again, he whispered to me, "You need to use the intensity with which you look at and hear the women's parts with the men's. and ... be moved by the music."

So I closed my eyes. I already love the music. I have already spoken to God in this manner. so I went there. I didn't think about one cue, but they all came out just fine. funny how that always happens. and the Choir sounded incredible. So many musical problems fixed themselves. and I was moved.

Phil Olson would always say, 'You have to move yourself before you move an audience." and you know, I am often moved (even to tears) while singing, but I have never experienced that depth of emotion while conducting. I was truly transported--just as I was in the little chapel of the conservatory fifteen years ago.

A friend said he looked up and (****!,) was practically terrified with the gaze he met. Dr Shapiro said he'd pay money to see that again. But really, all that matters was that I am starting to break down these barriers in a medium I am still becoming familiar with, and I can be moved once again.

Musique à Paris

2011-07-17T12:42:00.000-07:00

The incessant rain turned us away from our plans to see the night show at Versailles Chateau and instead we ran through the clouds to find tickets to one of the the two operas in paris, both closing on Saturday: Cosi Fan Tutte and Othello. At the old Opera House (Palais Garnier), Cosi was already sold out, and the chances of getting through the stand-by line were so slim, we decided on Othello at the Bastille.

There are two lines to buy day-of tickets. One is for full price tickets- whatever's left. Once that line is completely through, they start on the 'student' line and sell all tickets for 25 Euros. We (of course) divided and conquered to be in both lines to secure places. But once the full price line went through, the only tickets left were over 105 Euros. So we moved to our places in the student line, hoping...

Yes. We had 9 of us in 170 euro seats as music students in Paris, hearing the best pit orchestra I have ever encountered. Congratulations to maestro Marco Armiliato. The 3+ part cellos in the end of act 1 and most of act 2 break your heart, the tutti strings' pizzicati never more artistic, the solo english horn / oboe so mournful... we all cried for Desdemona--Tamar Iveri. if not for her goodness, her pianissimo high La's. I was enthralled.

We have been completely spoiled here as far as musical performances go. Within a week, we've had the opportunity to hear:

- Randall Scarlata, Baritone, with Benjamin Boyle on the piano performing the Dichterliebe, Faure's Horizon chimérique, Barber songs as well as Boyle's own Passage des rêves

- April Clayton, flute, with Teddy Niedermaier and Philip Lasser on the piano playing 'Jacques le Romain,' Bach's Sonata in em, Philip Lasser's Sonata (magical! Absolutely Loved it), and Prokofieff's famous Sonata for flute.

- and Emile Naoumoff: Nadia Boulanger's prodigy, pianist, theoretician, virtuoso, teacher and composer (you know, the kind that write piano concertos at age 9, whose parents fled from behind the iron curtain to let him study in Paris, and who solfege both books of the WTC in all keys for fun). We listened to him speak for two hours, but he could have gone on all day. He played Nadia's Lux Aeterna, Lily Boulanger (her sister)'s Pie Jesu, and Nadia's 'To the New Life.' His briliance extends far beyond the keyboard's connection with his fingers. He is the music. It was incredible. Wish we'd heard more. We'll have to come back. Plus, if we were always satisfied, why would we need to keep living and discovering?

Metamorphoses of Conducting

2011-07-17T07:44:00.000-07:00

Tiffany (Princeton) is squatting on the ground, weighing down my ankles to ground me. Nicholas (London) is standing at my left, getting hit in the arm every down beat, and Dr. Shapiro (NY) is keeping my back straight and growling at me every other bar—I am in Charge! RAAA. Cave woman! POWER! RAAA! KILL the baby seal with your downbeat!

I’m starting to develop this crazy rage in my eyes (suitable for this music), but when Audrey (Harvard) giggles at my 'douceur' being transformed into a feline I cannot keep a straight face. Last time, I played a porcelain doll hearing beautiful music while conducting the sweetest 4 beat pattern you'd ever seen, and now, I am a lioness, every muscle rippling as she prowls through her kingdom.

When the first theme comes back with full orchestration, I stretch my arms as far as they go (trying to stay grounded) and bore holes into my orchestra in Salle Debussy.

My orchestra. meaning two pianos, eight hands (at least) and the leftover voices solfeging the viola, bassoon or horn parts. Fixed do of course.

boy, is this fun. and boy, do I have a lot of work to do as a conductor.

oh, and ps. one of the three grand pianos in Salle d'Indy was Debussy's.

practice rooms

2011-07-04T16:09:00.000-07:00

comparisons sometimes help with description:

practice rooms I'm used to in the US colleges:

little rooms, just big enough for an upright piano with a mirror or a grand piano
no windows
frequent problems with florescent lighting
plastered walls with chunks missing and sometimes random notes pinned to the walls
claustrophobic
no ventilation
smelly
spit and rosin remains
underground

practice rooms I'm getting used to:

12+ feet ceilings
antique paned windows
spacious rooms all along winding staircases
views of Paris out the window
branches overlooking your work
room to hear yourself
intricate carving along the walls and ceiling
golden chandelier in the center of the ceiling
pleasant wind tousling your hair
busts and paintings of famous composers who have composed in this very room....
Have I already mentioned that I love it here?

choosing a wand

2011-07-02T13:41:00.001-07:00

Baguette

no, not the bread
Baguette in French means 'wand'
as in a 'magic wand'

I asked for a directing 'stick' which is not correct (baton)
I was supposed to ask for a directing 'wand' (baguette)

after returning once more to the highest store up on the Rue de Rome, I had my choice down to 4 wands:

- a med-long triangle handle shaped dark brown glazed wood wand
- a short fancy curved handle painted red glazed wood wand
- a med-long bubble-shaped imperfect wood (looked like a leaf imprint) heavy wand
- a med-long milk-bottle shaped black painted glazed wood med-heavy wand

the black won. wasn't too long or too short. felt good enough in my hand. just heavy enough. classy. matches most of my performing attire. and most of my wardrobe. in my price range. sharp. gave it a wave. sparks.

Concert de Missionnaires

2011-07-01T14:15:00.000-07:00

I run into the St Merri ward building in heels and skirt straight from the RER B--the concert started 40 minutes ago but thankfully as there are still several numbers left--I haven't missed it all yet. The missionary on the piano waves me up to the front of the room... are you serious? I have to perform now? but then they wave me in the back room of performers... who is there but Christian Frandsen (abe's best friend), an Elder now down in Chartres. Can you go on next? sure! (haven't touched a piano yet today. going with old favorites)

Donc, je vais commencer avec Debussy, Reflets dans l'eau de ses Images I et puis je vais jouer le Prelude de Bach en Sol mineur transcrit par Siloti

It was a lot of fun. I felt right at home, doing what I love to do for people I love. Most missionaries made connections with me whether their companions knew me, they'd seen a concert, or they see my story on the 'Missionnaires' video. I was impressed with Elder Frandsen, Elder Dick, & Sister Pearce's singing, of course Elder Rakotondrainibe going crazy on the piano (we played together once before I left) as well as a chinese recent convert on the flute who studies at the Ecole Normale de Musique here (picture with S. Pearce and Elder Rakotondrainibe). The room was almost full, the mission leader bore his testimony to finish... it was a success.

The other highlight was EAMA Orientation. I knew that Ryan from BYU was doing the piano program, and that there might be another flutist or two, but I jumped when Joseph walked in the room for composition! So I'm in good company. I met the other 6 conductors here and Dr. Mark Shapiro who will be working with us. You might have heard of his Cantori New York as well as many operas, orchestras, and other choruses he's conducted. I was giddy to meet him. nervous to conduct for him. and a little scared for placement exams tomorrow.

Coins Préférés

2011-06-30T13:32:00.000-07:00

I'm home!

I shouldn't really say that, but it sure feels like home here. It took several hours to tromp around the Charles de Gaulle Airport, RERs, streets, Metros and more streets with suitcases (always nice the odd travels when I don't bring the violin!) bumbling over cobblestone, stairways, and doorways before I found where I'm staying ... and still, I couldn't be happier. I feel complete somehow.

It's not like I'm French at all. A third of my life is all I've spent there (diminishing rapidly the longer I live), and I don't believe I have a drop of French blood in me. But oh, do I love it.

It helps that the couple who has let me use their apartment is very much a home. They left pasta salad and a tarte au fraises to welcome me. This is the street where I live. After a short nap (had to tell myself very clearly: this is not bedtime, this is a Short Nap), I ran out to explore. First to learn my way around this neighborhood and then downtown. To Île de la Cité, Île St Louis, Hôtel de Ville, Conciergerie, the new Church Exposition, St Merri chapel, Sainte Chapelle (although missed the concert there), and the seine reflecting deep blue skies.

The pistachio gelato, the fresh fruit stands, the full roadside cafes at every turn. Public transportation, uneven pavement, people from everywhere in the world. The smells of fresh crèpes at every corner, smoke, strong perfumes, and body odor in the public transportation. The high fashion, the fitted suits, the pointed shoes, the strappy sandals and stilettos in the metro. The architecture, the language, the people... oh, this month is going to fly by.

This day of Wednesday / Thursday (there wasn't really night in between) has gone on long enough though, and I am exhausted (right on time!) day 1 over.

ps: happy birthday to leland spindler hope it's fabulunctious
oh and pps: I've not yet been here a day yet and I have been asked to participate in a concert... tomorrow night. HA!

Songs of Mary: an Honors Thesis

2011-06-26T09:32:00.000-07:00

more to come.

Singers Tour 2011

2011-06-20T08:25:00.000-07:00

I am a performer--I love tour. This year BYU Singers took us across Colorado and up to Cheyenne, Wyoming.

My favorite part of tour is speaking with the audience members. I love walking into the audience night after night and starting conversation with loving grandmothers, working businessmen, or the local teenagers. I love shaking hands with the dressed up six year olds who have just started violin. I love the audience members who know classical music and the choral art. I love those who have never heard music like this before. I discuss the parts of the program that were most moving. Often the little boys liked the more rowdy numbers and the fiddling.

One of my favorite new friends from the trip was Maggie. She lives with her mother at home and invited Karen and I to stay with them overnight. She was such a gracious hostess as well as a singer & actrice herself. Most often the neighboring stakes host the Singers, but in this case, Maggie was kind enough to offer us a place. Her favorite was 'Peace of Christ.' She told us that she was brought to tears during that number. We were able to stay up late and have deep conversations about things that really matter over macaroni and cheese.

It was thrilling to meet those who don't have much interaction with people of our faith in their homes, at school, and in the audiences. It was exciting to meet with high schools all over Colorado and work with them. Some might say that the art of choral singing is dying in today's society, but what we saw was quite the opposite. High School students were excited to work with us, were full of questions, and were impressed with the sound a collegiate level choir could produce. It's been six years since I was in High School, and we were still able to relate with one another and find commonalities.

I would not trade the time we spent on buses, waiting in high school cafeterias or stake centers, or in the sand dunes with the other stellar members of BYU Singers. I learned more about each Singer and was continually inspired. Needless to say, the whole tour was a success.

pics: 1. sightreading the accompaniment to our combined number, Littleton 2. performing in Sacred Heart Church, Alamosa 3. my best performance of Summersets with Dr. Staheli, Colorado State University. 4. 'Jinny' on the violin, Cheyenne 5. last concert in St Elizabeth's, Denver

the story of my FAZIOLI

2011-05-30T20:39:00.000-07:00

Shortly after returning from serving a mission, my parents asked me to start looking for a grand piano to complete their house in the mountains. There was also talk that this might be 'my' piano some day.

I slowly started contacting all piano dealers in the area and playing many different makes in my ideal size: 7 feet. It wasn't very long before I played on a Fazioli. I had first become acquainted with them when I was at the World Piano Pedagogy Conference in Las Vegas but I hadn't had a chance to get to know them. I sensed, heard, saw, and felt such a difference immediately. The keys knew what I was thinking. The softs were more delicate than any piano I'd tried and yet the power in the fortes was still strong. The keys were completely even all the way up and down the keyboard. I was in love.

After a few months of figuring out my top picks at each price level, I asked for a price range. Well, perhaps I could find a used steinway, or perhaps something smaller. But it was a reasonable price range. My parents came up for a weekend, and I showed them several different pianos in our price range. And then I had to play the Fazioli for them--just for fun. Yes, they were impressed.

I started looking outside of Utah as I was not falling in love with anything at that price level. I kept on running into Fazioli pianos among the used pianos of every other make. Each time, I would play and be in heaven for a moment. The piano dealer in Oakland showed me the wood on the inside--from the same forest in Italy as the wood that Stradivarius used. He had no idea how many books I've read on the Strad's. But the Faziolis in California were even further out of my price range.

Truthfully, I would be happy with any grand piano. I would be so grateful in any case. But I needed to research fully, make a smart decision, and find something I loved. I had found two pianos that I would be very happy with in our price rangem but did not want to make a decision quite yet. I asked every piano dealer if they'd heard of any used Fazioli pianos. They never had. Faziolis are new in America, and the factory in Italy only puts out a hundred per year or so. Mr. Fazioli likes to play each one until he knows he cannot improve it any more.

My mother says the Faziolis' sound is like thick cream. Each piano dealer that heard me play a Fazioli, and saw how much I loved it wanted me to get one. There is simply nothing like it. Then Baldassin Pianos called from Salt Lake City saying that he had a used Fazioli for me. But I would need to be interested in buying it without having played on it, because it was owned by a family in Idaho that might trade in the piano for another Fazioli. What a gamble--I thought. The other concern was that even if the price were substantially lowered for a used instrument, it would still be out of our price range.

While in Chicago, we passed a piano store several times per day with Fazioli waving to me from the window. I took the dealer there through the whole story, and he had a few things to say. Regarding the condition of the piano there, he suggested I talk with a known technician in Utah--Rick Baldassin. He's the one trying to sell it to me! The only other advice he had for me was upstairs in his studio. He has several pianos there that were of comprable caliber ten years ago. Today, he can tell which is the better make--the Fazioli in its sturdy frame needs tuning half as much as the others.

My mother called with a brilliant idea. There was an education fund for me (I only found out about it recently) started when I was a little girl, and only usable for post-undergraduate education. Apparently, they would let me use the money for my Masters and PHD programs towards a piano... making the difference from our budget to the used Fazioli. But was it foolishness and impulsiveness that wanted me to give up education money? Even if i were to spend the money, at that budget, I could almost get a new Steinway--would that be smarter?

This piano would not devalue upon purchase as it was used. I would perform on it countless times. I could teach with this piano. and I felt good agoit it. I gave them the 'ok.' The Fazioli was sent from Idaho; Mr. Baldassin even put on special wheels for me. He had me try it out after he had tuned it up... I went up to Salt Lake and was once again in heaven.

He gave me the gold and green key to the piano. a Fazioli key. I didn't think that it was quite real. but a few weeks later, it was wrapped up, and in place for Graduation. It is beautiful. All the piano faculty at BYU reassured me, 'This is your education,' 'it will always be part of your family,' 'you will be happy with it your whole life,' 'you made the wiser choice,' ... and I carried the key in my purse for a month.

It will be years and years before I have a home for this Fazioli, but it looks so beautiful here with the mountains in the background. My first concert with the Fazioli is in two short weeks. And I can't wait.

Chicago

2011-05-30T20:20:00.000-07:00

Blustery winds, shamrocks everywhere, the Midwest kindness, and choir students from across the country--we were swept away in a four day adventure over St. Patrick's day Parade in Chicago.

We were able to tour the Art Institute, get some Giordano's famous stuffed pizza, discover the architecture of down-town Chicago, the beautiful Roosevelt University and Auditorium, Millennium Park, and the Marriott Hotel where we lodged.

Right on Michigan Avenue, with the Lake right outside our window, and a computer who welcomes us by name, we felt quite spoiled. Every evening, I snuck into the Versaille-esque spacious Ballroom on the second floor. It was exquisite. I played the grand piano there at my leisure--usually bringing different Singers to perform in that beautiful space. Exploring the hotel was almost as exciting as exploring the city, and considerably warmer.

It was delightful to recognize so many faces from Wisconsin stakes, BYU Singers alumni, Stanford friends, and even my middle school choir director.
BYU Singers was chosen to close the convention. We entitled our selections 'Reasons for Singing' and were able to testify through each piece, representing Brigham Young University and representing all those of our faith. It was thrilling to end the program with "Each Day" by Stephen Paulus. We will most likely never have an audience as appreciative.

After much prayer and our last performance in Orchestra Hall, we filed out backstage to our designated room to offer up a prayer of gratitude.

Much to my delight, we were followed by Cory Katseanes--my first conductor at BYU and the head of the Music Department--who congratulated us heartily. His presence there meant more to me than his words. Then one of the heads of the convention came in and said, "we've been following Dr. Staheli for quite some time now... we didn't think that you could continue to improve! We've seen a lot of things this convention, this week... but you... You are the future of Choral music."

May I sing each day according to Thy Justice
Each day may I show Thy chastening, O God
May I speak each day according to Thy wisdom
Each day and night may I be at peace with Thee
Justice, Wisdom, may I be at peace with Thee, O God

Each day may I count the causes of Thy mercy
May I each day give heed to Thy laws
Each day may I compose to Thee a song
May I sing each day Thy praise, O God
Justice, Wisdom, may I be at peace with Thee, O God

Each night, may I do the same
Each day and night, dark and light,
May I laud Thy goodness to me, O God
May I sing each day Thy praise, O God, Jesu

Each day and night may I be at peace with Thee
May I sing each day according to Thy justice
Each day may I compose to Thee a song
May I each day give love to Thee, Jesu
Justice, Wisdom, may I be at peace with Thee, O God

Each day and night may I be at peace with Thee, Jesu

For the Beauty of the Earth

2011-05-28T13:23:00.001-07:00

There is a mountain on the property where I live.

The spring air could not have been more perfect this morning and I decided to take a little climb. I took up the path as far as it went and stopped for a moment, looking out over the beautiful landscape. But there's more mountain to go. So I continued to our peak and there I sat down on the rocky outcropping and started to talk with God. Yes, quite aloud. ... and some of it was sung (once I had enough breath to sing). It isn't until you get to the very top side of the mountain that you start to see wildflowers. The purple dew drops, the red fireworks, the white snowflakes and the yellow sunshines. They are a pleasant surprise wherever they pop up.

I am currently helping conduct BYU's Spring Chorale, and one of our pieces is 'For the Beauty of the Earth' (Of more like Ahv than uhv please!). I want so badly to capture the thrill and peace in nature through the music... this morning it was for the earth, the skies, the tree and flowers. (ps. I have quite a bit of catching up to do, so don't mind the order of the next few posts)

For the Beauty of the Earth, For the beauty of the skies

For the Love which from our Birth over and around us lies

Lord of All, to Thee we raise, This our Hymn of grateful praise

For the Beauty of each hour, of the day and of the night

Hill and vale and tree and flowers, sun and moon and stars of light.

Lord of All, to Thee we raise, This our Hymn of grateful praise

For the Joy of human love, brother, sister, parent, child

Friends on Earth and friends Above, For all gentle thoughts and mild

Lord of All, to Thee we raise, This our Hymn of grateful praise

THOMAS & I

2011-02-24T22:11:00.000-08:00

The Frederiksborg Castle was no boring art museum to a young Mormon girl. The paintings covering the chapel walls strangely resembled prints I recognized from our sacrament meeting picture binder. “Children, look! I’ve never seen this one—I wonder why the Church hasn’t used this work—look at the detail in that face. Can you see how beautifully the light touches the folds of His robe? Look at the colored feathers in the angels’ wings!”

My mother’s passionate teaching and excitement for art and life still echo in my mind fourteen years later. I am transported by Carl Bloch’s paintings. Both to Denmark and now straight to my Savior’s side.

It is my sixth time seeing the Museum of Art’s exhibit and I still can’t keep my eyes off of the very first work in the exhibit, The Doubting Thomas. The detail in the Savior’s face captures my attention. Ten minutes have passed and I am still standing here.

I cannot leave because I am in the presence of the resurrected Lord. He stands before me in the midst of His apostles. His confident and humble presence radiates throughout the room. I feel his love.

The cello soars with my thoughts. The orchestra inside the speakers echoes in the open space, and I recall that I am standing in the Museum of Art. But it feels like heaven: the Lord is there and there are rays of light streaming from above. My eyes find the corner of the gray wall and I follow it upwards just to check—the rays are coming through a slanted glass roof. The heavens must have opened above the glass.

My surroundings entrance me as much as they did as a little girl in Denmark. I am encompassed with beauty. Once again, I have the opportunity to be facing the Lord.

His gaze looks down towards me, his eyes full of compassion. He reprimands, loves and forgives me as I stand there. I look up towards him again and am surprised that his gaze is not directed to me, but to Thomas. Robed in the red of guilt, pain and passion, he stoops downstage with his face almost in his hands, disbelieving his disbelief.

Pity fills my heart at his crestfallen state. His humble, repentant heart now recognizes the wrong in his stubbornness. I want to weep with him. After all, I stood in his place a moment ago.

Puccini’s “Oh Mio Babbino Caro” now wafts in from the heavens. The soaring melody encompasses my thoughts—I hum along, stifling the urge to sing operatic Italian. I never remained silent as a girl. Denmark’s chapels were only invitations for songs and my mother would sing aloud with me. This weeping song seems a propos for Thomas.

I can’t help but think—would I believe? Had I really been Thomas and heard of my beloved Lord being resurrected, perfected and glorified, would I have believed? He would have been my companion, the very same Jesus Christ….

I look up to Him again and Christ’s wounds are suddenly glaring at me. The scar on his chest is blood red like Thomas’s robe. It sings of the atonement and crucifixion so recently accomplished.

We are all promised a perfected, resurrected body. But He chose to keep his scars.
They remind me—and Thomas too. How dare I not believe? I can undergo a change of heart. My stubbornness can also melt into humility. I can fall at his feet and adore. He is there.
As a girl, my mother would have stayed with me there for hours and ponder over the beauty in this art. But my stay must close; I leave for a while. I’ll come back to be transported again. And Thomas and I can have another long talk.

Why I like Walks

2011-02-16T10:12:00.001-08:00

you become increasingly honest
you are not in a hurry
it is easier to express yourself
walking is good for you
you can hear hesitation
you can stop whenever you want
others can open up
there are no wrong turns
there are no distractions
you can be silent for a time
you don't have to face each other
it seems you can go on forever
weather is irrelevant
you get to know the person you're walking with
you are not out of breath
you can see physical reactions to what you say
decisions are made more easily
nature is beautiful

The reason for this post is a recent conversation, one of the longest of my life. Not in time, but in necessity, emotion, and subject matter. I am an advocate of communication. I love getting to know people, seeing how they think, why they are what they are, This is the forêt de Marly, next to where I grew up. Sometimes my parents would drop us off here after church and we'd walk home through the forest. I loved Sunday afternoons when we would walk for a long time through this forest, talking, playing, eating plenty of wild berries and enjoying the nature. On the mission, the forêt de fontainebleau became a similar refuge. I love forests, pathways, and I love walks.

Birds, birds, birds!

2011-01-31T10:24:00.000-08:00

You would not IMAGINE how much noise the birds can make in my front yard.
On the north side of our secret garden, have one thorn bush and it is FULL of birds.
I try counting, and sometimes get to 100--but as they keep moving around, I am certain to be recounting.
They're not always making noise.
They must have prayer time. They are all silent for that.
During their etiquette lessons, they sing different tunes one at a time. That is the most enjoyable eavesdropping.
Music practice is quite obnoxious, the clusters they produce are quite alarming.
They should hire me.
They also have mealtime. That is their squealiest time.
Sometimes they migrate up into the taller trees around our neighbors'.
but once they see someone coming, they all swoop down into the thorn bush!
If they hear me singing and realize that it's just me in time, they just stay there.
Just walk past the secret garden sometime-- you'll see.

6th month back from the mission

2011-01-15T16:20:00.000-08:00

I've been meaning to write this since October when I had my interview with President Bateman. but I guess the life-train has kept chugging along a little faster than I could handle, all right?

Within a few weeks of being back in the states, I stopped crying at every reminder of Europe. I then only cried at every spiritual reminder of the mission. A few months home, and I only cried when they prayed for missionaries in the temple. I wanted SO badly that the missionaries would know the sacredness of their call. I wanted so badly that they would feel success. I wanted dreadfully for them to grow in this experience. Because I wasn't anymore!

I've thought of working at Mormon temples since I first was able to do ordinances there at age 12. More seriously at age 20. and even more seriously at 22.

By 'working at the temple' I mean volunteering--serving. We're certainly not paid. It's better in French: 'servante au temple' which means a servant at the temple. I applied as soon as I met my new church leaders at school. and started working shortly thereafter.

You should have seen me after the first day of touring where I would work. Ecstatic. Ebullient :) I was completely giddy. As giddy as when I first received my mission call.

The funny thing is that nothing has changed. Every Wednesday, however long the day has been thus far, I become increasingly happy with my time working at the temple. I love it.

Stress Relievers I experienced this week

2010-10-24T00:20:00.000-07:00

Viewing a play
Playing the violin

Momentary deafness while riding a bike
Momentary stillness in a campus crowd

A compliment, sincerely given
A text, interrupting a study

Song à haute voix in a house to myself
Song à haute voix in a room full of friends

Colorful fall leaves crunching under feet
Crimson wild flowers catching in my hand

Hearing trusted friends while in fervent prayer
Hearing a flawless, fearless performance

The south edge of campus, overlooking the lights
The south edge of mountains, stained pink at sunset

Creeping into bed while rain taps on the window
Cozing in a sweater with friends by the fire

Gospel Principles
Goals to be Better

Creation by Song

2010-10-17T18:44:00.000-07:00

I have always been fascinated with mythology, and more specifically, creation myths. Much to my delight, many of these varied accounts often depict creation by song (some examples are Eru Ilùvatar & children--Tolkien, Hopi Native American myth, Aslan--Lewis, etc). It may be the voice of many gods, singing together in unity. It may be the voice of the earth as nature springs forth. It might be the voice of a lion, creating light, mountains and trees with different beautiful notes. In our doctrine, it is voice, the voice of God, 'let there be light,' and the light was.

I recognize true musicians when I am transported by their music. They have created a world in which I can feel and be. How do we create these worlds?

This weekend, we heard from Elder Christofferson, "work creates beauty--especially consecrated work."

and from Elder Scott,

Faith is a foundational building block of creation. Faith transforms what is maudlin and common into Symphonies of Joy.

Consistent exercising of Faith builds strong character. Character is treasured porcelain made of select raw materials carefully crafted, formed in faith by countless consistent righteous acts fired in the furnace of uplifting experiences. It is of great beauty and priceless worth.

I am so easily moved by this music. By the spirit that we can put behind this music, by the freshness that we bring to create these worlds. I love the transformative power of this music. I love being transformed. I thank our Creator for our talents, for our ability to feel, to know, and to testify. I thank our Creator for Song.

Consistency

2010-09-16T20:56:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of endings in my life. I am a mover. There are also a lot of beginnings.

I have said goodbye so many times, leaving a camp, a ward, a state, a school, a country, and even a continent. I have made so many friends all over the world. And I've had to said goodbye to the most.

One of the greatest surprises of leaving Jerusalem as well as France was returning to a place where I had dear, close, real friends. I was disheartened at my departure from both places, but returned back to places where I re-found (retrouvé) so many quality people with whom I shared great discussion communities. I rediscovered places that I loved, programs and teachers that I had loved, and people that I loved.

and I was, in fact, loved!

This was so starkly different than the moves of my childhood when I left church, history, friends, school, landscape and country to start completely anew. Every start was filled with both excitement and a sense of dread. Hopes were fulfilled, hopes were crushed. I never knew what I would meet in the newest adventure. Loving and being loved could take a long time.

But it always was an adventure.

Every other summer growing up, my Hilton family would have a reunion in Heber, UT. Regardless what country we were living in at the time, we would meet up with our wonderful family. That little part of Heber with the family was one thing that was ... consistent.

I have come to appreciate consistency. The friends that will always be your friends, the places that will always hold comfort, the gospel of unchanging truths, the stories and myths that will always enchant, the parents who love unconditionally, the covenants that I have made--these constants bring such relief.

Post-mission Surprises

2010-08-15T11:39:00.000-07:00

strangers speak English

I can hold and play with children

shopping is cheap!

I can spend as long as I want with my siblings

people don't dress up all the time

roads are wide, cars are big

California is actually very beautiful

drinking fountains (bubblers) aren't only in Disneyland

I am not called upon to testify often enough

talking on the phone doesn't always end in commitment

I miss France much more than I anticipated

life catches up with you very quickly

prayers come out in French

I want to write letters all the time

manners aren't quite as important here

dairy products all taste foreign

water and all drinks are served with ice

meals can last as short as 15 minutes!

my mom is Sister Wilson

laptops are wonderful

I like to be alone

there is always a lot to do

I love to see the temple

and go inside several times per week

my name is Mariah

the birds sing differently on this side of the Atlantic

air conditioning is a luxury

I am less talkative and more meditative

pianos deserve hours of playing

my hands hurt

2010-05-17T08:32:00.000-07:00

Fitgerald is a gangsta'. 20, a huge diamond stud in each ear, a few more piercings and two metal necklaces with his african heritage charms showing off. He wears big bright blue high-tops, low riding jeans held up by a metal belt, and a hoody. ooh, and big headphones. topped off with a doorag and a big, flat-visored baseball cap.

we had our first rendezvous two weeks ago (after the weeks of calling as I told you) when he said he might like to be baptized. but then he couldn't see us for a week or two, and he works on Sundays. but he called us. "hey, soeurs, eu, i was just calling, cuz, starting Sunday, you're gonna see me at church. eu, ya. just talked to my boss, and i can start later each sunday. ya. " YES! I think we told his story to every ami who is Not coming to church to show them what can be done if you really have the desire. We got a moment to meet with him, and told him that we were preparing a baptismal service on June 13th. Do you want to prepare to be baptised then? ya. sure.

He showed up at church in great style. complete black tux without the suitcoat, complete with silver stripes and buttoned vest... left the baseball cap, but kept the headphones and the studs. oh we were so happy.

I've never been happier. It just keeps getting better and better. can you imagine!
love you all, lisa and jolyn i have written letters but not sent them to reply to yours.

Soeur Wilson

Monday May 10, 2010

2010-05-13T19:50:00.000-07:00

It has been weeks that I've been calling Cadette, rescheduling and scheduling a meeting. She had frequented the church of Jesus Christ of Latterday saints a few times when she was a little girl in Haïti. It has been so long, but something in her pushed her to find out what it was all about. It seems like with every golden 'ami,' there are several cancelled rendezvous before we actually meet. We finally met her this week!

We got off 40 minutes of an express bus in the middle of nowhere to meet her. we were dropped off on the side of the freeway. no one in sight, cars whizzing by... but sure enough, after a while, someone started walking towards us on the other side of the road all the way down the hill.

She has light shining from her face. She accepted the book of Mormon with open arms and an open heart. In an ideal first lesson, we ask new investigators what questions they have that they might like answered in the course of our meetings. All of her questions, in stead of being doctrinal, were how she could act. How can I come to church? What do I wear for church?
*
There was a group of teenage boys that came and sat behind us on a train we were on this week. One of them said that he knew me. oh ya? my beautiful but very timid companion refused to look towards them, but I asked him where and how. He thought that maybe it was in LeClerc ( a grocery store, but not where we shop), with someone else. Well, it has gotta be me, there's no one else with red hair wearing a nametag of Jesus Christ. They were so excited that we were americans and wanted to speak all of the phrases they know in English (all english books here start with a scenario: where is bryan? Bryan is in the kitchen) and we thought it safest to hop on the next car at that stop. We left, explaining about sisters and missionaries on the way out.

But we were followed by a man with a basketball.
'Good move.' uh oh--- but he was interested in our message, and he and probablt the whole car of people had heard quite clearly that we were 'soeurs' (what the french call nuns). He will come to church next week. and hopefully english class. As we were talking about faith and religion, we arrived at the 'terminus,' Melun. We all got off. including the gang of boys.

Instead of making fun of us getting off but staying on the train, two of them came up to me, asking what we really did. and how much we were paid. As I calmly explained that we are not paid, our families and us pay our way, the white one became really shocked. They are both muslim. I said that I still respected them a lot. and they looked at us one last time and said, now quite serious, that they respected us a lot too.

A little about calling down the powers of heaven. Saturday there was a stake RS activity that I really wanted to go to. Not only would Nogent, my home ward, be there, but I also had to help the sisters of Melun sing their song.

We had invited all of our investigators, and several said 'maybe' but then had cancelled. The night before, we did not have an investigator to come with us, but I had even signed us up on the carpool with an investigator. We Had to find one!

I went into the bedroom and continued calling people on my knees. then, after praying again, a name of an eternal investigator I have never actually taught but who came to church once came to mind. I called. She was interested. and she was going to come. if she woke up.

Throughout the night, I kept on praying that she would wake up. She is a school teacher, and tired, but it was our last bet! I prayed so hard. Even that morning.

She showed up, and a recent Convert, Ella also showed up for the carpool. oh, I praised the name of the Lord. I was so happy. So much thought and prayer, and God has to do something. The powers of Heavevn were called down.

Thankyou for your love, support, you are all great.

Soeur Wilson

2010-04-06T13:39:00.000-07:00

A young man who warned us of danger a few weeks ago in Combs la Ville.

His guant face marked me so as he noticed we were protected by the Savior. but he begged us not to linger in that area, there were often ... tragedies. After we followed his counsel we left that place.

Last week, I saw him sitting on the steps of the Palais de Justice right next to where we live. I stopped by him and said hello sir very politely. I then caught up with my companion who hadn't recognized him. I refreched her memory and told her who he was. He then was right behind us. He said-- « I've just remembered who you are! And you're still alive! I mean, I guess you have the Lord with you... anyway, have a good day. » and he was gone.

But Monday, we were on our way to Paris, and he stopped us this time. He said, this is crazy—I've now run into you three times, and yesterday morning, there was a evangelical brochure in my mailbox. I think that the Lord is trying to tell me something! He just talked to us for several minutes and gave him our number and the church's website. He told us that he had never really been a believing person, but he was ready to start searching. Wow.

I know that all those who are in your paths are put there for a reason. We are surrounded by angels.

I testify of Jesus Christ. Of his life, his ministry, of his atonement, of his resurrection, of his teachings, of his love, of his healing and his forgiveness, of his strength and of his mercy.

I love you all. thankyou for your prayers and support.

Love Soeur Wilson

Calling "Just 'Cuz"

2010-03-15T20:10:00.000-07:00

You never know who you're gonna get on the other side of the phone line. Missionaries have so many numbers of people that were, at one time, interested in learning about the Gospel of Jesus Christ. They might be ready now, to hear the message of the Restoration, or they might have learned and seen the opposition and decided not to accept it.

Zahia seemed nice on the phone, a young woman of 24, half portuguese, have tunisian, and French; but I had to call to cancel the rendezvous we made. then she called to cancel the next rendezvous scheduled.
but I called her again on Sunday, just 'cuz.

Things were not going right in her life, with her work, with her boyfriend, with her friends, and she left (despite the cold) her home to go wander in the forest alone. There she let her soul out to God. She asked--please, just send me angels. send something, someone! She lingered in the forest as she had nothing to look forward to at her apartment. and then I called.

I'm not sure why, but I chatted and chatted on the phone with her. I asked her about her life, work, drivers lessons, and got to know her. She was waiting at the bus stop in Nemours when we came off of the bus and we were immediately close friends. She told us of the circumstances surrounding our call. In the opening prayer, she said, 'God, these must be the angels that you sent. Thankyou. ' She had been in a similar depressed state when she first met Elders on a train in Fontainbleau and received a Bood of Mormon.

She can no longuer go to sleep without reading passages in the Book of Mormon, and when she has troubles, she opens the Book of Mormon at random and receives her answers. She is so sincere. Even though this is the first time we met her, we invited her to be baptised again-with the proper authority. 'Can I be baptised again?'

yes. and you'll have the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost: what you're feeling now. really? do you have this feeling with you ALL the time? that is so wonderful! If you are worthy, yes. You will have this feeling with you all the time. and you'll be ready by April 24th. 3 baptismal dates and 8 new amis this week!

love you all, thanks David and the Bennions for your letters that were sent at Christmas :) finally got them! Cait, I'm praying for you!

Soeur Wilson

An Optomisitc Vision

2010-03-08T19:28:00.000-08:00

Dear Blog readers,

President Staheli said that the membership changes in Europe were progressively less and less. it got 'up' to -6% in 2007 finally, and in 2008 it finally broke even. + 6% membership! everybody was celebrating. and then in 2009 it became +20%!! can you imagine?
The first presidency asked the area authorites why this change had happened. and if they could say one thing that spurred this change. The Europe area authorities concluded it was because of "an optimistic vision shared between members and missionaries." or something like that. and it is true!
I finally got to call Eleonor yesterday. She was disappointed in her church and meets with about 10 other people who are all dissappointed in their various churches who meet together to pray and read the Bible. She started talking to the Elder's Quorom president in our ward on the train one day, and now she is excited to meet us.
A member from Geneva called saying that she had a friend who lived in our area who would like a book of Mormon. We talked to him on the phone and will set up a rendezvous for this next week. After another call from missionaries, we find out that he walked into the Exposition downtown Paris and had a first lesson with the Elders there.
A member from Troyes (about an hour from here) called and said that her boyfriend lived in Melun but came to church with her last Sunday. He might be interested in taking the lessons.
Elisabeth (still progressing baptismal date :)) told us that she was talking to a dear friend who prays with her often. She told her (Henriette) about the missionaries. How 2 sisters come to her place and get her on the 'road to Salvation.' Henriette said that she was looking for more spirituality in her life right now, and could really use a boost from us.
Alphonsine Gazawanza is a lady that was standing at a bus stop where we had to wait for 20 minutes last week (my companion HATES waiting for busses, hehe. i don't mind so much--maybe it's just that it was -2° C yesterday) I just talked and talked to her. I gave her about the first discussion, and she was wanting to come see our church if she wouldn't have had knee surgery this weekend. We'll go visit her tonight.
well there's more to say. That's what I think at every single rendez vous. More answers to your questions. Everysingle practice session, there's always more work to do. Every single prayer. There is more I'd like to say. Every single time I talk or don't talk to someone I wanted to--if only I'd said something about prophets! But life is about progression, and although opportunites leave, God creates new ones. always.
Love you all! Thanks for your prayers.
Soeur Wilson

Happy Valentines Day

2010-02-16T07:56:00.000-08:00

EVERY companionship in the Paris Zone has one or more baptismal dates. (ours is elisabeth now!)

We showed up with a foot of snow on our heads and feet to Pamela and Etienne's house. They are a french couple that were found porting a year or two ago. Etienne had started to meet occasionally with the missionaries and Frère Cunche, the stake patriarch. Pamela would go into the other rooms since it was a little bit like a 'boy party.' both of them are very believing and go each week to the protestant church in Melun.

After having introduced ourselves and sung that first (awkward) time, she called to invite us to have a moment together with her, just her. To prepare herself for the rendezvous she read the joseph smith history story. She had so many good real questions.

Wouldn't God have prepared a way that he wouldn't have to take his authority away from the Earth? She asked our conversion stories and why we were serving missions right now. The spirit was so strong and she then shared why she is a christian. Her family has Indian roots and so her family is not Christian. but there was always something that attracted her. As an adolescent, one time she came home feeling a great burden. She could not explain it away, and finally locked herself in her room and cried and prayed to the Lord. She felt bad for everything that she had done that was not in accordance with his will and at the same time felt a great comfort, peace and joy. Since that experience, she has 'walked with Jesus.'

She asked for a copy of the Docrine and Covenants. Etienne came home halfway through the rendezvous and started answering some of her questions. This whole time she has been dying to ask all these questions. It is so beautiful. She is starting to see the need for a restoration of the fullness of time.

love you all, happy V day
Soeur Wilson

Elizabeth

2010-02-10T17:22:00.000-08:00

We were tracking in the dark and in the cold, but finally came to Elizabeth's house. We sang the opening hymn and she was touched to tears.

Over the phone, I have figured out that she was taught a little bit of the gospel earlier, but after some offenses and being physically and emotionally hurt, she hadn't had the elders over.

We talked about the Holy Ghost and each shared times that we had felt it. She shared even of a time when she was beat that she prayed so hard to the Lord. She felt an incredible peace. It was as if the man were beating the wall next to her. When her 4th daughter was in utero, the doctor's discovered that there was no ambiotic fluid around the baby. They were going to kill it several times because they were afraid that it would kill her. but she went into labour and was a celebrity in the hospital. She felt an overwhelming peace from the lord that let her keep the baby.

She said that the problem with the times that she had felt the spirit was that it leaves after those experiences.

I said that she needed to receive the Gift of the Holy Ghost to be entitled to have the Constant Companionship of the Holy Ghost. She said that she would like that.

love you each,
soeur wilson
congrats to sister Aurélie Stumont who is engaged!

Pictures!

2010-02-01T17:32:00.001-08:00

In case you don't know Mariah, she's the BEAUTIFUL redhead on the left!

Church

2010-02-01T17:26:00.000-08:00

My favorite lesson this week was Sylvain's. His page in the area book only has record of one lesson, but he is the friend of the Pires family from Brazil. (Sister Pires drove up to nogent several times to help me teach a brazilian family a long time ago, it is great to find her here too!) He just happened to be over when we called and agreed to a rendezvous on Saturday. He volunteered with us for the ward activity for fundrasing for the Ordre du Malte for Leprosy beforehand. We came upstairs with him and Soeur Pires.

Then her husband, Fernando Pires came in. Then Dominique Lamyam (whose sister I taught 2 lessons in St Ouen) showed up, can I join the lesson? ! and then Didier Patoux came in, baptized only a few weeks ago (peter i told you about him in a snail mail on the way).

So, with the class full, and all for Sylvain, we had rapt audience. Of course, I had them all sing (maybe it's better when just sr brough and I sing) and pray. There was an amazing spirit there. I just asked questions and we all discussed.

He had supposedly already learned about ther premortal life, so I asked why does God feel it important to give us the knowledge of the Premortal life? What does that change for us? anything? after her understood a little more clearly free agency ('i don't think it's right that we all do what we want') we kept on explaining the purpose of this life and the spirit world.

He turned to us and said, 'that's the whole problem. what church is the one with the truth?'

had he not been taught about Joseph Smith? maybe it was just too long ago.

That is the same question that a Joseph asked in 1820. Perhaps you would like to read his account?

Then each of the members shared their specific conversion stories of their answers, which were different than Joseph's. He said, 'all I ask is that you and God be patient with me.'

The next morning, he came to 45 minutes of Priesthood/RS before going to work. ! wow. AND he brought his friend!

just some news...

2010-01-18T16:05:00.000-08:00

Sunday was my last sunday in St Ouen. 4 investigators were at church. I performed Dr Anderson's arrangement of Oh My Father to which I wrote a violin part. This is really MY ward. Little Hugo who was baptised a few days (btw, lots of investigators there!)ago cried from my song until a half hour after church was over at my leaving. I have never given so much in my life as I have given to them. how bittersweet.

I was almost expecting President to call me for the transfer news as I didn't feel settled with any of the options(he only calls if the circumstance is weird. the assistants call the trainers). and call me he did. 'I know I had told you you'd go to Versailles, but I wanted to give you a head's up...' it seems every other transfer that he 'gives me a heads up' for a special circumstance.

I am whitewashing the elders of Melun and opening a Soeur equipe there. There were previously 4 elders in the ward, and all are being pulled out. and just sisters :) yeay.! It is as far away as you can get from Paris while staying on the RER. some people tell me that it's in the 'campagne' and super far away, and others say, oh, that's still the Paris Banlieu ! we could come visit you.

I will be companions with sister Brough who has accompanied me on the violin for the last few concerts. So this might be a music transfer. wow. en plus- I've always thought that I'd like to open an equipe. what a great challenge! I'm taking the Défi! can't wait! It is one thing I haven't done yet. we will be on fire! next missive from Melun, love

soeur wilson
ps thanks micah and LUCIE Xa for the emails

Highlight of the Week

2010-01-11T17:30:00.000-08:00

The highlight of the week was of course Fabienne's baptism. We woke up that morning and saw snow covering the whole world. how appropriate! it was a wonderland. we checked many times to make sure we had the towels, the music, the programs, the baptismal clothes, the violin, the coats, the cake-- and we were finally out the door.

I haven't been able to contact Priscilla since the New Year, and both sr Gifford and I thought that maybe we pushed the gospel too hard or maybe we said something they had taken in the wrong way, but we should have had more faith. She called that afternoon, asking what time the baptism was. !!!!!! i did a little dance and could hardly keep the excitement out of my voice when she called. Ya know, when all you think, pray and talk about are investigators, you really get excited for them.!

Fabienne came in early, bright as the sunshine. She said "everybody kept warning me about this week and all the opposition that would come before my baptism, but it was a great week! probably because I was praying so hard!" Combined with the prayers of all the missionaries in Paris, the members in St Ouen, and the families across the world, God does hear and answer prayers.

and another one of my prayers was answered when Pricilla AND her HUsband Neil (!!!!) came in and sat in the back. THey looked like they really belonged here.

Fabienne was in tears starting with the first talk by Frère Loisel on Baptism and throughout the whole service. Marie Nikiema gave the talk on the Holy Ghost. She did not know how to read when she joined the church, but learned last year through reading the BOok of Mormon. The first half of her talk was simply reading out of the new RS/ Priesthood manual. We were all as amazed by the spirit the was brought by her being able to read as well as the role of the Holy Spirit.

I then stood up and read the words of Baptism to her before we played the piece I wrote for her. All there were so filled with the spirit, that even when Neil said, 'has anyone tried doing a canon ball into there [Baptismal font]?' I didn't mind. I didn't hear him swear ONCE the whole baptism. and he had bought a nice sweater that morning for the occasion.

after having seen almost 40 baptisms since 2009, I think that I will never get tired of them.

I love you all very very much. I loved 2009 so much. every moment of it being a missionary endowed with power, strength, virtue, knowledge and very much engaged in so many good causes.

may you be strengthened in each of your good causes. thanks for the emails Rich, Loli and Micah

love,
Soeur WIlson

schizophrenic mangervous...

2010-01-04T10:26:00.001-08:00

I found a fische in our area book that does not have my handwriting on it! Her name is Hermilie and it only has a record of a few lessons that took place about 10 years ago. I called her and we sang 'we wish you a merry christmas' to her answering machine. She said that our voices awoke something in her that she had forgotten and would like to see us.

I met her at the metro stop and recognized her right away. She's haïtian. and she was there with a 10 year old daughter Emmy. She has trust in the missionaries already, but ranted about things that block her 'chez les Mormon.' -- Baptisms for the dead. Things they do for other people, Living prophets like the ancient prophets, authority ....

then we figured out that she is a baptized member of the church! she had a calling 10 years ago when St Ouen had to go to Paris Lillas because of construction. when her daughter was an infant.

she kept on ranting, almost angry, but we just listened. Slowly, very slowly, she started remembering things-- talked about how warm, familial and kind the Mormons are. despite all that. and then how she always accepts the missionnaries. and then I asked to sing a hymn. We did and she sung in harmony. it was beautiful.

Then she started to bear powerful testimony of how there is a feeling that you only get in a Mormon church that is not anywhere else. about how the Book of Mormon says true things even though she doesn't really understand how it came to be. About how she sometimes defends Mormons to the Protestant at the church she attends. About testimony meeting, about the Loisel family...

I reminded and reminded her to come to church, but she didn't show up. so I called after RS and stayed on the phone until she agreed to wake up her daughter (i have a suspicion that she was already awake) and come before Sacrament Meeting.

and they came. and had a wonderful sacrament meeting. She Loves church. Her daughter is our new amie. and she-- she is a lost sheep that is found.

can't wait for anOther baptism on Saturday, Fabianne! her baptismal clothes are in our room and she is shining already. Happy New Year everyone. and thankyou Brad, Maggie, Micah, Mal and Jen for the birthday / christmas wishes. love you all.

Soeur Mariah Wilson

Christmas Spirit

2009-12-21T20:23:00.000-08:00

The last two nights I have laid in my bed, just as Jane and I did many christmas eves ago, so excited that I couldn't sleep after coming home late after our two missionary christmas concerts. There has been so much overflowing joy in my life lately that I can hardly contain it. Christmas of Lights, full of joy, of hope, of redemption, of compassion, of love.

Priscilla's husband was at our rendezvous this week and insisted on picking up a pizza for us. "Priscilla told me you probably would want no meat-- vegetarian?" great! he left us so we had a few minutes with Priscilla alone.

She told us that she was reading on line about a Member who was talking about the Word of Wisdom and had plenty of questions. that's where the meat question came from.

about a month ago, Priscilla realized that she had headaches when she didn't have her coffee in the morning. so, she thought it was time to give it up. She told her family last christmas that she wasn't going to drink wine with them-- she talked of the opposition to her decisions, but how she had overcome it all. wow. but by that time, Neil was back.

yes, he is scientologist, but he started asking questions. What do you guys think about the trinity? what is repentance? and after death? ...

well, we answered all the questions, but didn't get to teach priscilla anymore. She turned to her husband and said "i'm shocked. I didn't know that you had those kind of quesitons!" "I'm just curious, that's all!"

All of the concerts went so well. there weren't any dry eyes in the audience. I could not be more grateful to my Heavenly Father for giving me gifts that make me so happy. et tout brillait, tout resonnait, tout annoncait, Jésus est né! On entend encore chanter: Alléluia!

Merry Christmas All. I know Christ lives. let us all take His hand and follow the hem of his garment with faith.

Soeur Wilson

PS. congrats mallory for your mission call! and Jolyn, I am so excited for you to go into the mtc!!!! love you!

Joseph

2009-12-07T11:21:00.000-08:00

Happy St Nicks day!!

It was after English class, and we were in the last metro on our way home. there were no seats, but as I looked around, I nodded in greeting at an older sophistacated French man a little ways away. after a few stops, the seat in front of him was vacated, and so I sat down across from him. "Are you French?" ... not my best pick up line, but people rarely remember exactly how we started talking. after just a moment, he started asking so many questions, I could not believe it. He said that he's seen many, many missionaries, but none other than me dared talk to him. He asked all about my music career and our faith and doctrine. I threw in some composer's names and some mormon and biblical terms like 'prophets,' 'revelation,' and 'priesthood' when I looked at him and said, 'I'm not sure how much of this you're understanding.' -- ' it's good--keep on going' he told me.

So after explaining all about the organization of the church etc., I got to find out that he just came from choir practice. he opened his briefcase and the only things in it were his 'partitions', his choir parts. We sang together and laughed. I told him about our concerts and asked about his. At La Défense, I gave him a website card with our number on it if he had more questions about concerts or anything (because he had said that he has his proper Christian beliefs).

Well, he called the next day (for those of you non-missionaries, that is AMAZING!) and wished me happy holidays after about one minute of questions that made it clear to me that he had checked out the website. but then we kept answering questions for a half an hour. He is So Curious.
Well, he's not inviting us over yet, but now we have his phone number, and I'm finding an excuse to call him back. :)

love, Sr Wilson

PS- thanks sister Adams (mikah) for your emails!
and Mallory (editor)! when are you getting your mission call?

Thanksgiving SUE

2009-11-23T07:55:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Sue is a wonderful Buddhist friend that came to English class over the early summer. Her English is perfect but comes to practice.
and she came this week. For English class, after we played a little Oops and Analogies, I took over and talked about Thanksgiving American traditions. Then I invited them to our special ward party 'Thanksgiving à la Paroisse' on Saturday with the bribe that I would be making pumpkin pie.

After a few people shared they were thankful for family, sue cried. Afterwards I asked her about it, and she told me of her mother who has passed away some time ago. I asked her if she believed in the afterlife (reincarnation was the answer) and shared that I believe that she will see her again. I also told her that I'd be singing in English at the party--but she worked Saturday night and probably couldn't come.

Saturday night rolled around, and we had gone broke on preparing all sorts of things for the activity--colored feathers for all to write blessings on and stick on the big turkey on the wall, two pumpkin pies that were the hit of the 'tarte' table, and Wassail I had made as well.

The activity could not have gone better. Sr Gifford and I had copied a grid with things like 'find a lefty' 'sing someone a song' 'share something you've learnt this year' 'play tic-tac-toe with your neighbor' etc. and the different crowds of non-actives, members and friends of the church mingled and laughed as they searched for signatures.

After our District Leader's spiritual thought, I sang 'My Shepherd will supply my need.' Sue had run in right before, bringing candied chestnuts and hoping she hadn't missed the song! when I did sing, tears came to her eyes. After all was over, she hung about and looked at a Book of Mormon. Can I have one? YES!

love you all! thanks sister Hall for your letter! eat some turkey for me! love Soeur Wilson

Oh, the work here is Booming. I love st ouen. I love the people here. I love the English and the French language. I love the Africans that love Jesus. I love music. I love public transportation. I love talking to random people and finding out that they were 'once' a member of the church. I love contacting people after exchanging funny faces with their kids. I love wearing a name tag that says Jesus Christ. I love getting text messages from someone who's house I went to a month ago and had left a note in her mailbox. I love when people like Bussmann come to church to thank a member who has helped them move and kept on being their friend even after they had stopped taking the missionary lessons (she's starting again!).

And I love sharing the gospel not because I am a missionary, or because I am called or because I am supposed to teach this, but because this is Who I Am. because this is what I know, what I have discovered, what I believe with every fiber of my being. It's true!

Christmas Contacting Quest: violinist

2009-11-16T13:46:00.000-08:00

After delivering all the music to be copied for the Christmas missionary Choir concert to the bureau (office) on Friday, I sat purposefully in front of a lady that had a violin case on the RER A.

After she had finished putting on eyeliner (people do anything and everything on trains), I asked if she were a violinst and introduced myself as one. She was going off to a performance in Nanterre! and she teaches at Gennevilliers (near st ouen) and invited me to play with the orchestra at her conservatory. (if you're in good shape...)

As I bore testimony to her between noisy screeches of train wheels (i have really started to get used to it), i talked about the spirituality in music and the gift that it was from Heavenly Father. She quite agreed. She gave me all of her information so that we can do something together. and then proposed a free ticket to her concert tonight if I liked.

Later on, during what was supposed to be our dinner hour, we arrived at the 'maison de Musique'... Sr Gifford said that it was My house (maison means house btw). I was soooo blissful and glad to be able to stand in the line for 'invited guests.'

Many asked about our badges, and we talked to everybody around us about the program, music, God, and church--of course. The quality was San Francisco Orchestra (well, the backup band they used for a few numbers was less). The program was Brahms Ballade piano solo and then a bunch of things arranged for string quartet with a soprano solo,( one Schoenburg) and then a group of Schubert Lieds arranged for violin, cello, and accordion. with the soloist. WOW. blew my ears away. lots of pizzacatto, left hand placing, playing with the stick, and Pointillism orchestration. I was in heaven. the arranger / transcriber is likely where music is going next... so cool. i pulled my colleage away before mahler's kindertodenlieder but i knew that it would be better if we were obediently home on time.

Oh how I rejoice in this wonderful chance I have to wear (porte in French which also means carry and means door) the name of my Lord during this short time. and it is so fun to be with another Blue (greeny) too! I love doing the right thing. I love working with wonderful people. I love singing to those who suffer and who need support. I love the gospel of Christ. gros bisous to everyone!

soeur wilson

PS: thanks to Luther and Mal and Cait + Micah Adams!for recent emails!!!!

Trajet Contacting

2009-10-19T17:04:00.000-07:00

trajet means commute but just sounds so much better.
With the help of the Holy Spirit, we decided to pass by a non-practicing member of the CHurch of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints in a part of our area that we are not in very often. and, of course, we just decided to Spiritually find all the way there.

I always wonder what compartment of the train I'm supposed to sit in or who I'm supposed to sit by... maybe someone is praying for something we can answer! As the train slowed in front of me, I looked to a group of seats and thought, we should sit there. I told Heavenly Father that I am doing all I can to follow You, I will sit there, and I know that you will send people to us.

We had many amazing conversations with people who came over and sat with us, wanting to discuss doctrines of the bible, or just curious about the church. One lady was reading the bible and I interrupted her to ask what she was reading. When I introduced us, she said that she was also in the church of Jesus Christ! and yes, she would love a visit from us.

Although I don't know if she knows about the restoration of the church of Jesus Christ in these latter days, (latter = after Christ) I will be happy to teach her.

All along the paths of life while we are busy going places, learning things, there are so many lovely opportunities. they're everywhere! take advantage of life. Love you all -especially the BYU 26th ward! Soeur Wilson

another one just to fall in your lap

2009-10-12T08:03:00.000-07:00

During church, I was sitting with Ovoh, a member girl I have been working with. She commented on the missionary stories shared in Testimony meeting and pointed out to me how easy it is sometimes to share the gospel. Just saying what religion you are opens crazy doors to wonderful experiences.!

After the baptism just two hours later, she contacted someone reading a sign for English class on the door of the Church! She invited her in to come in talk to me. Christine is a party. She said that she’s off to sing in her Gospel Choir but she’d love to learn English a little more and would like to know what the Church is all about.

Yes, we can help you. I'll sing gospel with you!and teach you about the Gospel of God.

another one just to fall in your lap.
missionary work seems so easy sometimes. people want to know the Truth.

One night, we stopped off at a members house, who unfortunately couldn’t teach with us. As we were leaving, rain started to POUR down. She was an angel to lend us a huge sturdy umbrella that really saved the day. We sang as loudly as we could as we walked around deserted rainy St. Ouen to deliver a Liahona and to teach Mary-Charlotte. Singing in the Rain, My Heavenly Father Loves Me, Raindrops on Roses, the Paris Mission song, Be Our Guest… with plenty of splashing for accompaniment. I love Paris.

I'll have to save all the other miracle stories for another day. Love you all, and Jo and Jen your emails meant the world to me this week!

Prepared and Learning

2009-10-05T08:15:00.001-07:00

On Saturday, I was blown away at how prepared some people are to receive the restored gospel. Nobertine is a divorced woman from Congo with four children ranging from 9 to 18, the oldest of which has autism. She is beautiful, professional, and going to medical school! I am so excited to get to know her and her family.

At work, she met a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and finally told him that there was something in him that was so different. He told her about his beliefs and she wasn't even surprised. His family values and respect so apparently spoke of faith in God. How do people see that? this must happen so often but we don't always speak up about what we see in others or about our beliefs. Society is kinda closed to that kind of thing I think. but Nobertine was open and ready.

We gave her a tour of the church in St Ouen and explained how you can become a member. As we showed her the chapel (past the piano ;)), sister Lee asked if we could sing a song. There were tears in her eyes when we sang, 'families can be together forever,' and she asked for her own Proclamation on the Family. I explained that it was written by Prophets, foreshadowing the breaking up of family and teaching the true doctrine of our responsabilities in the family. She understood far more than the words I said. She said that she would have to photocopy it for all of her brothers. I gave her 5 more copies of the Proclamation instead :)

I have been studying Knowledge. I want to keep on asking for more and more revelation, inspiration, knowledge. I want to learn more than is said, as Nobertine did. I want to have a thirst that can be quenched only if I realize that it's there. I have to yearn more, ask more, seek more. How am I satisfied with what I already know? we all have so much to learn. I can't wait to study each morning. I love it. I really do. good luck with your midterms my Y friends. Let me know any of your big news. or how you're changing. I love changing. and special bisoux to my fellow butterflies!

'Suivi'

2009-09-21T09:06:00.001-07:00

Saturday afternoon it was again our alotted time at the exposition. So sister Lee and I went into Paris after playing soccer at Porte de Pantin and visiting Lydie Andani. I got out my violin as usual and started to play hymns, old favorites and new requests. One lady stopped in just to say thankyou for the music, it had fed her soul today. I started to play, Amazing Grace that she could hum along to and she felt the Spirit of God. couples on dates came in just to see what it was. and then Elder and Sister Stover came in with their guitars to see if we could put together Ashokan Farewell. a group of Chinese crowded into the exposition to listen. there were people there non-stop, and we again PRed. 26 in one hour. much better than the usual 3 or 4. How much fun we had.

just a little suivi on daniele for you:
Daniele met up with us in the Park again and I was able to introduce the Book of Mormon to her. I had dedicated it and marked a few favorites. We showed her a chapter to read, and she said, 'and after that chapter?' I told her to just continue reading, the power in the book will confirm its truthfulness. She promptly took out the book in her purse for metro rides and put in her new copy of the Book of Mormon. As she couldn't make it to stake conference this week in Versailles, she said to warn the people in our ward that there might be someone new joining the ranks. I smiled and said I would.

Thanks Jess for your email!!!!! i love you and Palo Alto people very much! Soeur Wilson

Daniele, a french woman of St Ouen

2009-09-14T08:22:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I have to remind myself that I am living in France. it is so much of who I am. getting out of the ghetto is so nice every now and then and seeing the majestic gothic architecture, the lines and lines of trees, the old cobblestone roads...

On Wednesday, we had an extra hour or two, so I told sister lee that we would have so much faith that God would send someone to the St Ouen park that would sit down and that we could teach a whole lesson to.

On the way there, I was able to bear testimony of wonderful truths and give out and receive phone numbers of those who might be searching for something that will bless their life more than ever before.

As we came to the park, and passed through most of it, not even thinking of what I had told Sister Lee last night during our planning. I looked at a lady alone on a bench close to the exit and I aksed her if I could chat with her for a few minutes about families.

she was more than willing, she was just getting a little bored.
As I sat down and asked her introspective questions, she expressed some of her deepest desires, questions... she said that it was interesting that we should come today, she was having dark thoughts this morning but God told her in her heart that she had more to do.
I said that it was interesting because we knew that we were going to find someone in the park today, we had told Heavenly Father to send someone.

We taught her what happened to her father at his death, her divine nature as a spirit daughter of God, the miracle of resurrection, and the whole plan of salvation--the Plan of Happiness!

I know that through Jesus Christ we can all become free from all the physical bondage that we experience here on earth. I know that we are eternal beings, ever learning, experiencing, teaching. I know thta there is a loving Heavenly Father with whom we lived before this life, and with whom we will live after this life. (don't make fun of my ruined sentence structure in english) I know that He shows his love to His children here on Earth every day through miracles, through his Holy Spirit, through the works of his servants the prophets, and his angels all around us, both mortal and not. What a glorious work we are a part of. how can we not lift up our heads, our voices, our song out of this world in our struggles and sing praises to God? If you don't feel His peace now, know that I know it is real and you will feel it through His answers.

with much love, Sister Wilson (thanks Cait for your email!)

A Rose

2009-09-07T13:23:00.001-07:00

Rose

do you remember how I contacted her? I sat across from her on the RER A and said that i liked her turquoise (shirt, earrings, necklace)... it was my birthstone. anyway, she has progressed so quickly during this short summer break that she's had off of work. After never really praying her whole life, two days ago she prayed to start our rendezvous: thankyou god for putting us together, for the fulfillment that has been brought to me, for the joy we have had together, for the blessings you have given me... she and I shed a tear.

we saw her last monday night at Lydie's house (my trainer's convert, now in my area) for an FHE. We taught about Sabbath day and she said that 'it's like recharging our batteries!' I didn't tell her that I had used that same phrase with many other amis. then we asked her to start praying about a baptismal date in October. At our first rendezvous, I told her that if she took the lessons, she could have the option of getting baptised when she knew that it was the right thing. and remember she's already come to Pablo's baptism. Lydie stood up and got out her pictures of her baptism just 8 months ago. as we poured over the pictures, the spirit just sang in that tiny appartment accross from the university on the 12th floor.
Rose came to church, again, on Sunday but this time with her 7 year old daughter. The whole time just kept asking questions, agreeing or struggling with comments and learning and trusting me, and becoming even better friends with the many members she already knows. She is such a gem. we have gone through so much together. she starts up work again this week and it will be crazy, but she said she'd keep calling me, she's not missing church, and she should be able to host an FHE next week...

Master, Rabonni
My LORD
My Soul doth magnify my Lord
and my Spirit Rejoiceth in GOD
my Savior
the lord hath shown unto me great things
and HOLY, Holy, holy is his name.
(as i quoted in Mary's Song I wrote on Singer's tour last year)

love you all,
Soeur Wilson

ps thanks to Steven for your letter
pps: tNt I think of you often, and good luck back to school byu crowd!
ppps: CONGRATULATIONS JOLYN METRO ON YOUR MISSION CALL TO GENEVA!

Golden Hours

2009-09-01T14:28:00.001-07:00

Last week, we had made it a focus to use the golden hours between 6 and 8 pm to do finding activities. we talked with people in the road, we called a ton of them, we rode buses, trains, metros, we asked survey questions about the family, meandered in parks outside where all could see us. The first or second day that we diligently used these hours, a man walking past us slowed to look at my tag. You have to be careful with men as a Sister in 'the 93rd' in St Ouen, but for some reason, I knew it was someone I needed to contact. It turns out that he was an investigator 4 years ago when he lived in northern Italy. He said that he'd love to learn about the gospel from us again--and perhaps introduce it to his wife and little daughter-- and left us with his number.

He tried to come to church and tried to schedule an appointment but let us down on both occasions. In each case, he called afterwards to apologize and make his excuces, however legitimate. Through these numerous phonecalls, I got to know that he is from Congo and was very integrated into the church in Italy. All of his friends over there are Mormon and he is still in contact with them. How does he live 5 minutes from the church and not find it for 4 years?

When we went over to teach him, we taught about Joseph Smith, the restoration of the priesthood and prophets on the earth again. I asked him to pray again to know if Joseph was really the prophet to bring in this last dispensation. As he told about praying about Joseph Smith before, he said that he had already got his answer. that he's a prophet.

wow. despite his little toddler breaking a glass cup (and plenty of other mischief) during the lesson, the spirit was there, and he was reminded of the gospel message and it's joy. He said that he told his wife about 'our church' already and has missed it here. Welcome back, brother, you are called home!

Prompted to Play Bach

2009-08-24T11:29:00.000-07:00

Saturday afternoon, we were serving in the Exposition on the Church next to the Pompidou center. I brought my violin again since it had doubled the number of visitors we had last week. it worked again.

everyone that passed turned their heads and read 'saints des dernier jours', 'jesus christ...' as they passed on. Many stopped to look at maps conveniently right outside the door where the music was coming from, to talk to noone on their phone, to smoke or to tie their shoes right outside of the door... i laughed a little... and still many came in.

A Chinese young woman left her number to learn about language classes and to be taught about the church. Another whom I taught about our beliefs was an Iranian/French who was teaching Economics of Religion and very supportive of our church and wanted to know all about why there is not yet a temple in France. The only flaw to the plan was someone asking how they could sign up for violin lessons... my greeny told him they were for free... :) sorry! but the most interesting visitor came when I stopped playing a poor wayfaring man of grief because of the slightest thought that I should play Bach. I recognized this as a prompting, so I started his first Partita for violin unaccopanied.

A man stopped and stared at me from the window for the first few lines. then he continued staring from the door. then he came in and sat down and continued listening. the second half was never as polished as the first half, but he still burst into applause at the end. I asked if he played the violin, and he said that he simply Loved music. I then played an arrangement of the Spirit of God full of open strings for him (improv on the spot) which he also loved but did not recognize. I told him how music had been such a gift from God, and most of what i'm playing are hymns in here. and how we give all Glory to Him...

He came over and asked about my life and what I had done with music. I told him of moving, of teachers and of praying to choose piano as a major. I told him of playing with orchestras and I bore testimony of giving up music to serve the Lord for 18 months. how my sacrifice was acceptable to God, and how he has let me continue to use it. He had tears in his eyes when he confessed that he was a head of violin from Verona, italy. he has taught violin for years. We both were touched by the testimonies that were shared and he told me to always thank God for the talent that I had. He wished me luck in the music world after the mission and bowed several times to me before he left. I told him I would praise my Creator until the end.

Even thought the experiences rack up--there are so many-- they are no less precious. to see the hand of the Lord, to bear witness of His Goodness, to have had his name taken upon myself in the Holy Temple, to have the fire of the covenants that I have made burn strongly within me, and to have had his image change our countenances... when we first walked into the funeral, the senior couple over the paris institute breathed a sigh of relief, joy, peace: you just glow, he said, you radiate for miles... to have our names engraved upon His palms. To be purified by his Holy Spirit, to do nothing that does not add to his Glory. to become his co-worker, to praise the Lord for ever.

i love you all, and special thanks to the Palo Alto Primary for providing my mail this month!!!

Sister Mariah Wilson

Rose and Saints

2009-08-10T07:29:00.001-07:00

it was 2 days before we got our area book back.

after calling everyone in it and writing down meticulous notes of when everyone comes back from vacation, I became very glad that there were so many gone... work has come out of nowhere. 2 quick miracle stories:

I met Rose on the train. she said that she does actually believe in god but religion is just not her thing. and she never has time because she always works at the hospital... except for starting tomorrow when she's on 'vacation' at home. 'I guess each person has their thing, their religion;' she said. I paused, reflected, and then said, you know, as a musician, I have been to so many different chruches and I always find myself coming back to this one. there is something... I feel something there that is only there.

that's about as far as i got before her expression changed. I want to meet with you. she said. can we exchange numbers?

I called her that night, but she wouldnt be available until next week.

saturday morning, she texted me. 'actually, I am available today.' we met her in a park an hour later. I told her very simply about what I do as a missionary. about a program to learn about the gospel of Jesus Christ that she can take or leave. about prayer. about God. she accepted everything. wants to start to pray.

and then came to church at 9am for all three hours!!!! she got the numbers of sisters in the ward and is even coming with the Relief SOciety to get ice cream on friday. when everyone introduced themselves to her at church, she said, soeur wilson is helping me discover this. but i'll see you next sunday. YEAY!!!!

Saint Gilles is from Guadaloupe. she took the missionary lessons there and went to church for a while there. after having a dream with a white lady (looks like me) giving her an airfrance ticket to Paris, she came over. but there was no church, no one had heard of the church of Jesus Christ. after a few months, she had to move to a hotel. after praying, she found the very cheapest one in St Ouen. happens to be very close to the church. in the bus home, she saw 4 elders coming on the bus. What's the address for the church?

We just met her yesterday. I know all the commandments! I want to get baptized! we made a beautiful calendar with everything organized to get ready for her baptism on August 29th.

''Maybe I'm supposed to tell someone about the church here in Paris. Maybe that's why I moved here, even if I don't have a n apartment right now.''

There are miracles all over here in france! and pablo's getting baptized this saturday!!! love you all, thanks for your prayers,

Sister Wilson

'Pregnant'...training

2009-08-09T09:15:00.000-07:00

The Big News this week is that I received a somewhat dreaded and anticipated call from the Assistants this Friday. I am going to train a new missionary. And I am going to open a ‘ville.’ And I am going back to St. Ouen. (my mission history is Nogent/ St. Ouen / Nogent / St. Ouen). I have not yet been in France for 6 months. I have only been Junior Companion. Time to grow up. Time to take all responsibility. Time to be perfect. Time to love. Time to be selfless. Time to learn. AH! So much to say, but no time now.

send me advice you past trainers mariahwilson@myldsmail.net!

Concert in Normandy

2009-07-27T16:09:00.000-07:00

exchanges this weekend took me to normandy, to CAEN.

it was especially a pleasure because sister Nicole Herway is an old friend from when we lived in Belgium who is just finishing up her mission there. She and her companion publicized and really talked up our coming for a concert for their little branch.

some of the other missionaries + members did piano pieces which were great to show off their little upright :) -- even a brahms rhapsody. then Sister Brough and i sang a nice arrangement of I Need Thee every Hour, and all the sisters sang my arrangement SSAA of Where Can I turn for Peace?

The spirit became palpable when I began to talk about the death of my grandmother, and my oppurtunity to play Meditation at her funeral. many were in tears when I played Massenet's famous Meditation from Thais. I also played the g minor sonata for unaccompanied violin and ended with a gypsy arrangement full of double stops, rhythm changes, and octaves of If You Could Hie to Kolob / Come thou Font. quite a change from the first time that Jane and I performed the first draft of this arrangement sophomore year of HIgh School.

the last one was by far the favorite of the evening. They stood up and clapped in unison for a while until the priesthood leader went up to the pulpit –I thought to say announce a closing prayer—but asked if there could be something more? … the other performers looked at me, and i don't have too much in my fingers on the violin right now… so I sat down to the piano, and played the showy Poulenc Italian Caprice. She plays the piano too!? Crazy.

It was so fun. the members begged me to come back to their branch--which I couldn't agree too--but I could agree to pray for them and continue in my gifts after my mission.

God was glorified through everyone who praised his name through music that night, and I was so touched to be a part of it. This tuesday marks 6 months on a mission... it is going by too fast!

love you all, soeur wilson

Quote of the week:

2009-07-20T17:56:00.001-07:00

Félicité is another ‘new ami’ that we are teaching, from Côte d’Ivoire and about 25 with the best behaved 6 month little boy i've ever seen, Ivan. She and her son came early to André’s baptism, church, and to our appointment.
"Is there a formation for baptism in this church?" :)

Miracle of the week:

2009-07-20T17:55:00.000-07:00

Randomly, I called Lény. I say randomly, but you know how the spirit works, nothing is really random. I picked her and her son Ulrich (6) up to come to church one of my first weeks, and she did stay for all three meetings with her son but never showed up for our appointments. She had disappeared pretty fast. Her name wasn’t even in the Area Book. But she was so grateful to hear sister wilson’s voice! Oh, she said, I need you so much. I need your message. Life is so hard right now, can you come this Saturday?

We went and she opened up to us. We taught half in English and half in French as she is from Cameroon and prefers English but her son doesn’t really follow in English. She has amazing internal values and character. She is so strong. I cannot tell you all the challenges she has, but she is living in a hotel right now (has been for quite some time) and really needs a place to live. She is being cheated out of money everywhere. And men are trying to take advantage of her. She was married to her husband in Africa but was promised a visa if she came to france. Her husband could follow. Well, her husband could not follow and she is stuck here. Without a visa. This was a long time ago. But she still won’t date or let the men take advantage of her because ‘I am married! I do have a husband even though he is far. And I still will love him.’ Not at all of the typical african wishy-washy commitment pattern, she is so strong and fierce. I love her so much. I am not sure how. She will not ever leave my thoughts. Can you please put her name on the temple rolls? She gobbles up our message, trusts us as servants of God, and knows that inspiration has brought us to her.

thoughts from studies:
And ironic that mom is practicing Faith in Every Footstep because, of the theme of faith this transfer, this week is Faith in every footstep. In every step I take. Direction towards Maëva, or towards Lény, or towards my companion, or towards Giselle and other ward members. I was chastened in some of my prayers… I should be doing MORE more more… update the area book, call more numbers I’ve received, talk to more people!

and then I read, My (daughter), despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, for whom the Lord loveth, he chasteneth. But he chasteneth us for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. … afterwards it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby. Wherefore, make straight the paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way; but let it rather be healed.

love you all,
Soeur Mariah Wilson

ps< thanks steven for your letter!

André is a rapper

2009-07-19T18:08:00.000-07:00

André is a rapper. I met him when he came to my concert and then when he came to ward choir. he loves music. I kept on being pestered to teach him voice lessons (which i couldn't agree to) before I left Nogent, when the elders started teaching him. after coming to a bit of a slow down after hearing all of the lessons from the missionaries, he decided that he really Did want a change.
I am so glad to be back in Nogent for this time in his life... 'I realized that I want bigger change in my life.' He has a huge smile and just couldn't stop smiling. after the baptism, and for the confirmation on Sunday. it was incredible. he is so humble.

for the service, I played piano prelude, hymns, interlude, and postlude and loved inviting the spirit and the words of specific hymns to the minds of the audience + 3 of our investigators there(!). my companion, Soeur Adams, and i sang I love to see the temple with a second verse I wrote (about how baptism is the first covenant we make in preparation) as a descant voice. it was really special. As I talked with him afterwards, he thanked me so much for the music that I was able to offer for his baptism. he was so grateful.

he later asked if I could help him compose some little parts for him on piano and violin. he only has one or two albums out, but wants to do something a little different. or even--could i just record them for him... we'll see. I at least consented to replay some of the old concert repertoire after the gouté (refreshments) for the members and amis left.

Maëva is another miracle.

Patricia moved into the ward just in time to hear my last concert and was really touched by it--she said it was an answer to her prayers and a confirmation that she was doing the right thing. well i never really got to work with her since I left that week, but we met with her my first week back. so she met Maëva outside of her apartment building (they are neighboors) and she asked for a book about God.

Patricia was excited to tell us about it and was almost in tears when Maëva (from Côte d'ivoire, 17 or 18yrs old) came to open the door for us when we came to drop it off. well, we didn't just drop it off.... Her Questions were all perfect, 'wait--what did the Lord say when he asked which of all the churches were true?!' and we will be seeing her three times a week. I can't wait to go back tonight to teach her!

love you all, and congratz MissMelissa Moorhead on your engagment!!! thanks for the card

Soeur Mariah Wilson

Jacob, Jacob n Sons

2009-07-07T20:24:00.000-07:00

I want to tell you about my favorite contact for the week. We realized the bus wasn't coming for 20 minutes, but i thought that we could stay at the stop... and i start talking with an old man. his name is Jacob and he is jewish. He's lived 8 years in Israel and so we became instant friends. I even sang "Hine Matov" with him, and then he translated it for me as we got on the bus together. We talked about the prophet cycle . and He talked about Jesus Christ with me, he only has feelings of love towards him. I told him about latterday prophets and 12 apostles, and he was impressed. He talked about god's promised people and loved the fact that we also believe that we're descendents form Ephraim. He said that he thought that one's heart always needs to be open to learn more about God. It was so wonderful to talk to someone that has a good religious background who isn't catholic or protestant!

I gave him the elder's number and he called them that night (i hadn't yet told them about him, but when he asked to come to church, the elders said, great! we'll see you at the gare!) and i was able to call him the next day.

He said, since I talked to you, I haven't been able to get that encounter out of my mind. I bore witness of the workings of the Holy Ghost and how he puts things on our minds. He said that when he talked to elder Milburn, he got a 'good feeling.' he made sure that i called to wake him up for church and asked what to wear...

He was the best dressed man at church, and loved it. He asked all the right questions and talked a lot. to the question in Gospel Principles class, How does the priesthood get transferred-- from Abraham to Isaac-- he answered, by the laying on of hands!

anyway, i hope that i'm still here when he gets baptized.

oh! and André (that is the rapper that wanted me to teach him voice lessons) is getting baptized this saturday!

anyway, the work goes forth boldly! there are miracles all the time here

i studied the 1st epistle of John this week in Personal Studies and was so touched by John the Beloved's personal witness of the savior. I felt like he was right next to me when he told me that he was a witness of the Word, having handled and worked alongside the savior Jesus Christ. He is a witness. when he asks us to have fellowship with him, as he could with the Christ, I thought of the line from my Pat blessing that I was called to be a co-worker with Christ. He talks about love, we have to love because God Loved us first---He sent His Son. and I have written unto you, young man, because you are strong , and the word of God abideth in you, and ye have overcome the wikedness of the world, therefore you are called sons of God.
LOVE

soeur wilson

Farewell to St Ouen

2009-07-03T20:15:00.000-07:00

Living in the ‘neuf trois’ has been an amazing experience. The ‘nine three’ is the nickname of the worst part of Paris after the first two numbers in the postal code. St. Ouen, St. Denis, and Sarcelles make up some of this area, including the Stade de France (three stops down from the ward building on the metro line 13), and also the Marché des Puces (the biggest and most renowned marché in Paris, takes up blocks and blocks beneath the freeway in the shadow of Sacre Coeur). Several times while being in this area, I have been reminded of the Middle East. The marché is just like the suq of Jerusalem or the bazaars of Egypt and many times, instead of attracting attention to hear the word of God, we are trying to get Away from the men on the streets. We were often stopped or at least tried to stop by men who call after us and even when I think it might be for religious reasons, once a man followed us all the way through the gare before he finally gave up the date he wanted that week….

Once we were stopped at a light next to a monument so Sr de Ruyter and I looked at a monument. I turned around because there was a man very close to me; I immediately asked him if he knew of the church or—but he said no, all he wanted was my hair. Anyway; that story just ends with him having a few inches of my hair… I figure that’s pretty good if that’s as much harm as I got in St Ouen.

I didn’t think that I could get as attatched as I am to the ward in 6 weeks. It was with tears in my heart that I wrote goodbye notes to our investigators and friends. After church, there were even members that I had never talked to that came up to me and asked for pictures together. There is something special that can happen with the Spirit, and it was a gift that I could get as close as I did to my dear St Ouen secteur. It’s not really goodbye though because Georgette is coming to UT for the first general conference that I get back. And I will probably be in their stake when I get to serve in Versailles.

The theme for that transfer in St Ouen was ‘Purity’ and I had the most amazing studies about purity in thoughts, being pure in heart, and pure doctrine. I have learned yet again how to open my heart and learn from all those around me, stay completely focused in mind and heart, how to love those around me, and how to teach the pure doctrine through the purifying power of the Holy Ghost. I have grown in understanding, patience, and in my faith in the Lord’s timing. All of the miracles that ended our last two weeks are testimony to that.

And we’re already finding miracles back here in Nogent. The work goes forth.

Love you all,
Soeur Wilson

Camille I got your email and also your snail mail—
you are doing all the right things, thanks so much for your support!!! and Mallory Hales thankyou so much for doing the blog. i love you!

Week of Miracles

2009-06-23T17:26:00.001-07:00

Soeur de Ruyter and I hopped on a train from St Lazare towards Sannois to do some 'porting' = door to door this last friday, june 19th. Trains are always hot and sweaty in the summer here. we sat down with 10 minutes before the train left and discussed our ideas and focuses for contacting people about the church. The car soon filled up with more and more people, including one next to my collegue with earphones in.

As the bell rang for the doors to shut, a lady ran in, looking for a place to sit. As she was starting to climb over some people across from us, i scoonched over and said 'madame!' there's more room right next to me! she nodded and smiled at me graciously. once she was situated (it took quite some time), she looked at my comp's plaque. tag. 'oh, have you seen a nametag like this before?' 'no, but it does something to me.' here, in her heart. I introduced ourselves and I started talking to her about our love of God and geneology work. she said that she is from spain, algeria, france, maybe even denmark ...and back to the Vikings. As I started to swing the conversation to why we do geneology and let her feel the spirit, she stood up suddenly and said that this was her stop (the first one!) and she was overjoyed to meet us. 'My name is leila' she told us over her shoulder as she ran out of the train.

great. i didn't even have a card with my number to give her for her way. she could have called us. and I didn't even get her number! as I was beating myself up a little, sr deRuyter told me that the spirit had told her to get down off the train but it was too late. it is one of those promptings that you need to act on the very milisecond that it is given. I hadn't even thought of getting off! I said, 'we could get off at the next stop and go back.' well, we decided to do it. we were already two stops down on a big RER line, but we got off and waited paitently for the train going the other direction. We revamped every second of the experience, including her interesting necklaces: one cross, one Nefertiti, one star of David, one Eye.... As we got off at the big gare of Asnieres, we looked around for where to go. already more than 20 minutes had passed. we looked around one side of the gare for a tiny bit and then sr de Ruyter said, I think she's on the other side. so we ran to the other side. we run-walked down the main street, looking in each of the shops for a woman with long curly hair, dark skin, and a big Hot pink shirt. that should make it easy.

sure enough, after a few minutes of walking, we saw someone with that description ahead of us and we started following...'is that her?'!!!! as I ran to catch up with her I said 'Leila!' [look of astonishment] 'what are you doing here??? I was just thinking about you!' well-- we felt something and we really thought we needed to talk to you about our message. We talked in the street for a long time and also met her sister. She is going into the hospital today so couldn't meet with us, but we are visiting her today for our last p-day together in the paris clinic of Jeanne d'Arc. she's another dreamer.

This is just one of SO many miracles that happened this week. thought i might post one so you can get all the details and be in that wonderful moment of being led by the Spirit. love you all! and congrats Emily Hendricks and James Duncan on your wedding this week!!! I love all Singers!

Recognition and baptisms

2009-06-08T04:06:00.001-07:00

the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is (finally) Officially Recognized in FRANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it will be announced in the Gazette soon. Church members can have tax deductible tithing, and all this nonsense about mormon=cult practice can start fading too. This is also a huge step towards getting a temple. there's this funny law that gives the right to police to walk into buildings at any time... we weren't willing to comply unless the police had recommends. :)

Saturday was the baptism of Grace Massamba. This little girl has a testimony of gold. She's from a big african family, a few of whom are baptized but none except for the grandmother are still practicing. The two weeks she came to church, i taught the primary song 'Baptism.' as the third verse talks about us following Christ's example, I taught the children and Grace about entering the way and the path to return and live with God. later on that day, she asked me if she could be baptized. She then asked her grandmother, her father and her mother (who do not live with her right now) and received permission. After finishing the lessons and committments, she was excited as ever for the ordinance.

ALL of the family came to the baptism. They each brought something to complete the huge african feast after the baptism and supported their neice /daughter / grandneice / cousin. When Grace came up to the pulpit to share her own testimony, her family was so proud of her. What an excample she is setting for them! We encouraged them all to come back tomorrow for her confirmation during the church meetings.

for the service, I was honored to played prélude, conduct the opening & closing hymns, played an imrovisation arrangement of the two "I know that My Redeemer Live"s that the other sisters sang, and then played Reid Nibley's arrangement of Our Savior's Love on the Violin. The ward threw their arms around me for the return of the music in their building and i was more than happy to be there with them too. As I left, Juliette Doumbia said, 'see you at the next baptism-- we'll have to baptize more so we can see you and get wonderful musical numbers.'

How great shall be your joy....

Alliances + St Ouen

2009-05-25T12:52:00.001-07:00

Alliances is the french word for covenants. Elder Todd Christofferson said this conference that Covennats help us smile and struggle through hardships. This is because the source of our power comes from God and the conviction that I have made a covenant to serve him and keep his commandments. Elder Bednar in this conference talkd about the committments of the blessings of the teple and what an honor they are. Their protecting power will guard and fortify us. He told us to let the fire of the covennat you made burn within you for strength.

while on a mission where there is not a temple yet, the fire of the covenants I made burn within me daily for strength.

In Moroni 10, we learn that the shedding of the Blood of Christ was a covenant. The Great Covenant between God, the Father of all, and us--ALL of us here on earth. Each covenant that we make is in remembrance of this great covenant. God tells us in Judges 2 that "I will Never break my covenant with you."

This is why having faith, having religion, and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints helps people's lives. This is why it brings us peace, joy, patience, long-suffering and love. it is because we Know that the Lord will keep his end of the deal. And we have made more and more promises with him that he will keep.

Of course it hurts a little more to fall from a higher mountain, but to feel the air up there and see the beauty up there, and to understand how the town works down below is so worth it.

I'm in my second area, St Ouen right by the great big arch of La Défence in Paris and loving it. It is busy and full of people. and it is a big area, it takes us at least an hour to get anywhere. but we keep at it. we're working with a lot of people, none of whom are really progressing yet, but all of whom I love.

thankyou for your support, love and prayers!

Love, Soeur Wilson

ps: thankyou hannah & emma wilson, Loli, and david zobell for your letters! and i got a hello from my district leader from Jared Kelson! hope your stay in France was great.

Grace

2009-05-18T04:09:00.000-07:00

Miracle of the week

My last day in Nogent should have been packing and going to the new ville, but i don't have that much stuff to pack, and i want to get out anyway. plus, the transfers took longer than usual so they were going to be late. anyway-- we scheduled a last minute rendezvous with the little 10 yr old girl grace. her grandmother is active and her father was once baptized but she has not had the blessing of church most of her life.

We had done one the with her and her cousins on the story of Nephi (i taught them the I will Go and Do song in French) a month or two ago but hadn't been able to see any of the cousins since. but she was at church this Sunday and i sat by her when i was doing the music for primary. For singing time, i finished teaching them the Baptism song and the primary president asked each of the children to draw or write what they had learned from my teaching afterward. It is so rewarding to work with children.

anyway, after sacrament meeting, grace came up to me and told me two things: one, that she wanted me to teach her to play the violin (i had done a musical number-- Nibley's Our Savior's Love) and two that she wanted to get baptized.

well, the grandmother asked permission of both her parents and at our rendezvous we talked of the Joseph Smith story. I also played a little more violin for her, but the best part is that we set a baptismal date for when i can return to Nogent for Grace's baptism. what a gift for my last day in Nogent.

love you all

soeur Wilson

Divin Amour

2009-05-11T17:06:00.000-07:00

I had the most wonderful weekend.

I got to witness 9 baptisms on Saturday and I realized that I would be transferred to St.Ouen this week. I have felt like I would be leaving beloved Nogent for a few weeks now, but it did not change the fact that I love Nogent, each member in the ward and each investigator that we’re teaching. And that’s not even counting the fact that I have access to a grand piano here all the time. What blessings I have been given!

Sunday was as sacred as it could be. I taught the little primary children songs and felt of their spirit. One little girl there, Grace, is in a part-member /less practicing family and I have been to her house to work with her family on several occasions. After we sang about Baptism and talked about the beautiful song that we had sung together, she told me she would like to be baptised in the church.

It was the Aaronic Priesthood Sunday for Sacrament meeting, but I was still given the chance to bear testimony to all who were present and give a musical number: Our Savior’s Love arranged for violin/piano by Reid Nibley. After thinking about this great man and the life he lived, I thought about the words of the hymn and each verse having to do with a different member of the Godhead. I thought about the love of God that is manifest in the condescension of His Son and the love for those who were baptised on Saturday. I thought of the many times when I have been able to testify of God’s love to people all around me. An investigator who had come to the baptisms had laughed when the person confirming spoke and professed the love of God for his children. She did not understand then that this whole work is about love. As we explained it to her, it is at the core of every principle. What a wonderful work we are involved in!

Sœur Wilson

Miracle of the Week

2009-05-05T15:56:00.001-07:00

There is a program that the mission president has invited us to use constantly to interact with ward members called the 'set a date program,' or "fixer une date" In this program, we visit families of the ward and instill the fire of the gospel and of sharing the gospel in them. We then choose a date in the future to have a soirée together where we will return to the family's home with an investigator--who may have been found by us or the member. We also choose a time each night where we will all pray together to find someone, to have someone's heart softened or to be able to think of a friend to invite over for a dinner *with the missionaries.

Well, we tried it with the famille Gonga who we have been working with recently to read the sciptures together as a family. So our lesson had seeds and sprout in it and excitement on our faces.

This saturday, we came back to the Gonga's. Frère Gonga had brought his friend, Olivier whom he had told us about to dine with him and his 'church friends.' Olivier has worked with Brother Gonga for six months, and the last few they have eaten lunch together every day. Brother Gonga never really talked about his religion with him, but Olivier did. He has been converted to CHristianity and taking chatechism lessons that take a year before he will be a catholic.

How can I write each of his searching questions or describe the spirit that was around the dinner table? After our description of the apostasy and the truths of the gospel, he said, i think that the Catholic church actually doesn't have all the truths that you are describing. I'm starting to think that all the churches I've looked at are wrong. later on, he said, I would like not to drink coffee either. I need to stop smoking. If I got baptized in Paris, could you come to my baptism?--there is a church at St. Merri close to where he lives.

I think that he was crying when we left.

doesn't everything just make more sense in the gospel? it is all so beautiful. can't you all see that?

love
soeur wilson

thanks for emails brad and malpal- happy spring everyone

Miracle of the Week

2009-05-05T15:56:00.000-07:00

There is a program that the mission president has invited us to use constantly to interact with ward members called the 'set a date program,' or "fixer une date." In this program, we visit families of the ward and instill the fire of the gospel and of sharing the gospel in them. We then choose a date in the future to have a soirée together where we will return to the family's home with an investigator--who may have been found by us or the member. We also choose a time each night where we will all pray together to find someone, to have someone's heart softened or to be able to think of a friend to invite over for a dinner *with the missionaries.

Well, we tried it with the famille Gonga who we have been working with recently to read the sciptures together as a family. So our lesson had seeds and sprout in it and excitement on our faces.

This saturday, we came back to the Gonga's. Frère Gonga had brought his friend, Olivier whom he had told us about to dine with him and his 'church friends.' Olivier has worked with Brother Gonga for six months, and the last few they have eaten lunch together every day. Brother Gonga never really talked about his religion with him, but Olivier did. He has been converted to CHristianity and taking catechism lessons that take a year before he will be a catholic.

How can I write each of his searching questions or describe the spirit that was around the dinner table? After our description of the apostasy and the truths of the gospel, he said, i think that the Catholic church actually doesn't have all the truths that you are describing. I'm starting to think that all the churches I've looked at are wrong. later on, he said, I would like not to drink coffee either. I need to stop smoking. If I got baptized in Paris, could you come to my baptism?--there is a church at St. Merri close to where he lives.

I think that he was crying when we left.

doesn't everything just make more sense in the gospel? it is all so beautiful. can't you all see that?

love
soeur wilson

thanks for emails brad and malpal- happy spring everyone

note on fashion

2009-04-27T14:47:00.000-07:00

Since Louis XIV, fashion for the male has been as important as for the female. sometimes I forbid myself to laugh outloud, and sometimes i am impressed. Pointy shoes are all over on men. and scarves. socks always match the shirts as you know, not the pants... that means lots of purple, pink and baby blue too. Bright* green suit and pants. nice white suits at church--a fan for the africans. linen suits of varying tans. Magenta pink suit pants with a white and black checkered cordaroy suitcoat.

happy end of finals to the byu crowd

soeur wilson

thanks jenlee for your letter!!!!! but you didn't leave an address so i can write you--could you get me some for all dynamite?

Worthy of a call

2009-04-13T19:12:00.000-07:00

About a month ago, I talked to some high-school-aged kids on bus 120. They were surprised that we were ‘cool’ (also a French word, don’t worry) people to talk to. Anyway, they saw me again, leaving the bus yesterday evening and shouted out “Jesus Christ” as my name.

I may have chuckled at their wave, but was thrilled to have this time in my life where I can not only hear ‘Jesus Christ’ and look, but where I can be referred to as the Saviour. Although it would be blasphemous to even compare the Lord with myself, I am right now engaged in His work. John Taylor said, on his way to the France mission to a troup of Indians, “I am engaged in my master’s business, to be a minister of Jehovah, to lead them to life, light, and everlasting truth.”

A great big evangelical African woman, railed with a full voice for 15 minutes how blessed I was for serving the lord, and how blessed my family would be, and how blessed my children would be… .

We had two new investigators this last week who both made me think about our calling:

Françoise said that her favourite thing about us coming to teach her was the light in our eyes when we talk of Christ… it is so bright.

Monica told us that we had the talent of preaching like a good preacher—when the word can go into her hearts. I told her that it is not our talents. Every member in our church teaches and preaches. But the Spirit of the Lord is what brings our message to the hearts of the people. You are feeling the Spirit.

The Lord is in charge of this work. His name is on our hearts. His will is the only thing we strive for. I pray that we can attain a little bit more of our potential by continually all striving for that together.

i love you all-- let me know how you are doing when you have a moment!

Sœur Wilson

Préfecture and Performance

2009-03-30T08:22:00.001-07:00

I was sitting an hour ago in a room full of foreigners to France for my second rendez-vous at the Préfecture. The walls were lined with people from all over the world, of every age, size and color (don't worry, i was by far the palest and the only remotely red-headed) waiting. Waiting to see if they can become legal in France. The palpable stress and tension in the room was overpowering as each person glanced up at the blinking numbers every few seconds to see if their number would come up.

... what a great p-day ...

Last night was my french debut. I gave a free recital for the community at the Nogent ward building where they have a nice shiny grand piano. The program started with Bach in good mariah fashion--organ prelude and Debussy's Reflets dans l'eau (both resurrected from my sophomore recital), then played a flashy arrangement (well, actually an improvisation) of How Great Thou Art, Ravel's Ondine, another improv of Nearer, my God to Thee, and finale with Poulenc's Italian caprice. As I introduced each piece and tried to explain why I am on a mission here in france, the Spirit filled the room and I hope many felt my testimony through the music.

While we were all visiting afterwards, the Evèque / Bishop pulled me aside and told me that i had impressed so many that he is organizing back-to-back concerts April 26th and inviting civil authorities, mayors, and pastors and bishops from other faiths... it wasn't until halfway through is speech that i snuck in a plea to put as many hours between the concerts as possible for my ou-of-shape fingers' sake... .

So it was a success I guess. so many of the members came up to me afterwards telling me that they now had more people they could invite to the concert that would be uplifted--they'll ask them for next time. I guess they didn't trust me for this concert, but i'll keep you posted for the next.

I LOVE BEING A MISSIONARY!!!

Sœur Wilson

ps--thanks jared kelson and pamela ash for the letter/email!

MIssion Transfer 1 Week4

2009-03-16T14:17:00.000-07:00

the sun is starting to come out, it is Printemps, Springtime. no blossoms yet, but you can smell it and feel it in the air.

and not just the sunshine. on Saturday, when we walked outside, you can tell that it is just about to rain. but it stayed that way all morning, much to my delight. today it was warm enough that i didn't put on my scarf on our morning run to the Marne River. and one day this week we went to visit soeur bize and were completely soaked when we arrived even though it was not raining! it was 'misting,' the clouds were on the ground. do you remember that?

this week, we found Therese in the area book. She is a sister who was previously taught a little but lost contact until we called her. she had invited her sister over with her to listen to our message, and had read the bom since the sisters saw her last :) her sister, Evelyn started to cry when we sang I am a child of god, and both of them went on about 'that's powerful, so puissant' boy, am i grateful for the power of the spirit and the power of music together. m&ms : music & missions with the spirit

CEsar, a j a in the ward made flyers last week for the concert that we need to put in as many boulangeries and concervatories as possible, so starting the publicity should be another fun addition to this week. i just hope i have some time this week to do some slow practice!

i saw emilie causée this week at institute with adeleaide, although we didn"t have a chance to talk, she looked beautiful and happy with all the j as there.

Vincennes is perhaps my favorite endroit of our secteur. woops, that was half french- favorite place in our area. it is great old parisian architecture, a little more rich, and has great open places with little woods and parks. we did our district contacting there this week, stopping everyone we could out of the metro with the other elders in our ward, trying to tell them about the miracle of the gospel. not very many listened, and the one girl i talked to for a half hour turs out to be out of our area and only really wanted to talk to me, not any other missionaries... argh

the lord has blessed us so much. we are seeing two baptisms this week, neither of which are our own, but both of which i will be giving musical numbers :)
three sisters / investigators / amies came to church yesterday and we can start teaching 2 of them! we are getting more amies each day.

the old lady who always comes to Cors D'anglais , english class, consented to listen to us 2 weeks ago and actually really likes our messages. she also has us read english books into a recorder (fine for some of our service hours)
and this week taught us to make clafoutis and gateau au yaourt. you guys should make clafoutis more often, just cut up apples (or cherries or anything else) and pour over crèpe batter with a little soda, and pop it in the oven til it's set. lovely.

congratulations to jane for being in tune and in the right places at the right times. and what a comfort to know where the lord is taking care of you and is aware of each moment. this morning while cleaning the apartment, we listened to sherie dew's talk god wants a powerful people and was uplifted at her message that god really knows us individually and would have it no other way. what a blessing.

I am so touched by elder eyring s words that we can be comforted if we are feeling the spirit. the spirit is the great purifier, the testifier, the comforter, the light, the consciece, the helper, and if we have his constant companionship, we can know that we are doing the right thing, and we are doing our best.

i restarted the bom in french apart from all the other studies that i'm doing and was also struck by sariah's humility. she really is teachable. even when she worried and complained at her sons' trip to jerusalem, the moment* she learned, she turned around and started to testify. she was not stubborn about being wrong, or didn't dwell on her fault but learned and glorified God in the process. let us all overcome our faults, turn to god and glorify him.

love you all!

oh, my apartment address is
18 rue de cherbourg
94360 Bry_sur _ Marne

love you

soeur wilson

Bread Crumbs

2009-03-09T08:15:00.000-07:00

there is still flower on my shirt.

living above a boulangerie can be very exciting. we haven't really taken advantage of it apart from a pain au céréale and a pain complet... until tonight.

after returning home late from teaching a crazy brazilian couple, we noticed the bread dumpster that is usually in our courtyard was out on the street. each night (this is me inferring), the boulanger fills up a brown bag full of the bread they did not sell and throws it into the 'bread dumpster.' what a waste!!

to my great surprise, my trainer / mom / companion opened the dumpster and pulled out a pain au chocolat twist. mmm. but it was stale and... nasty.

but my compainion insisted and we went back to the other side of the dumpster to what was obviously the produce from today. and pulled out a fresh baguette pointé and a great big roll of brown nut bread.

conclusions 1. it was a delicious addition to our vegetable soup. 2. we won't do it again. 3. we now know what's in the bread dumpster. 4. french bread is amazing. 5. this upcoming week will not only be 'French week' but also 'no patisseries' week :) ... some things can be too much of a good thing.

thanks for emailing, camille and family! i'll write you slow mail next week.

bisous,

Sœur Wilson

The First Picture!

2009-03-07T08:17:00.000-08:00

Me and my companion! [Editor's note.... that is just a guess. I'm not really sure who the other girl is.]

Last words from the MTC!

2009-02-17T20:52:00.000-08:00

This Tuesday, I was escorted by 11 elders through San Francisco, CA. We met at 5 am to leave and breath in outside-the-bubble-air. (Those of you who think that BYU is a bubble, it is nothing compared to the MTC.)

I whipped all these Elders into shape. I forced them to memorize scriptures in French and practice this contracting conversation in French. I made sure they obeyed the rules and chided them for their classroom habits (maybe it's just because there are only 3 people in my class that we cannot sleep! (: )

Everything went smoothly with the visas, and so I will be in France this Tuesday at 11:15 am!!! I also heard rumor that Elder Oaks will be visiting.... After our visas we grabbed lunch in Chinatown. The taxi driver stopped off at several lookout points to see the bay and the Golden Gate bridge. It was a lovely day. In the plane, after studying and memorizing, I read all of Mosiah into Alma in French. It was beautiful.

Even through we weren't allowed to proselyte, one of the Swill Elders continuously carried others' luggage, papers, car seats. We all should have done that, that is what being of the Church of Christ is all about. The last few days I have studied the atonement while preparing the plan of salvation lesson in French. It is so beautiful.

As I returned home at 9 pm, I came into District testimony meeting and realized how much I missed them all. I was also able to testify of my Savior Jesus Christ. I have such Confidence in Him. I will bring all I can to Him. I will give all I have to Him. Give my heart to Him, I will come unto Christ.

"I cannot deny thy pow'r Lord, they Tears of blood which wash my soul. Thine easy yoke, they burden light-- that gives me rest and makes me whole."

All of them are so strong-- Sœur Aymon, Elders Occolier, Olivier, Galletti, Ugalde, Kutterer, Delgado, Santo and Ginato. Praise be to my lord.

The Gospel is going forth boldly, nobly and independently.

xoxoxox Sœur Wilson

From the MTC: Jan 30, 2009

2009-02-03T15:28:00.000-08:00

Here I am, sitting in the MTC Laundry, facility with my dear companion, Sœur Aymon. She is from French Guiana, an only member in her family, and is a branch of 25. She is simply delightful. Yesterday in our first companionship study (after I changed branches, districts, rooms, keys, etc.) we sang, "Souviens toi" together. She has a great ear and we both shed a tear.

My other two roommates are French natives too and they fawn over me as well as the French native Elders. They love my accent and mannerisms and my frustration at finding the best way to say something ("It sounds poetic!").

I love every moment here. The scheduled time I was afraid of is easy. There is not a moment when my heard does not swell with the Spirit of God.

I am a solo sister in my "ESL advanced" class, but the rest of the time I can stay with Sœur Aymon. I love having time to study personally, in companionships, and only read and speak in French.

It is so lovely here. My first day +1/2 here have been so wonderful.

Love xoxo
Sœur Wilson

Address & Farewell

2009-01-27T21:24:00.000-08:00

This is Soeur Wilson one last time. I have been set apart by President Jacobsen to be a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the France Paris Mission. !
I am called until July 5th, 2010. and I enter the MTC tomorrow, January 28th, 2009. anyway, my cousin will periodically update some pictures and or letters from France since I will be busy studying, serving, teaching, and loving.

This last week has been the happiest weeks of my life. From a wonderful father's blessings, to being set apart, to a wonderful Stanford I ward conference, to wonderful home teachers, to Adam, Jane, Abe, Peter, Hannah and Rebekah, to singing with BYU Singers, to hearing BYU Singers, to happy reunions with so many of my favorite people in Utah. Here are the addresses just in case. I would, of course, love to hear from you from time to time:

[MTC address] Sister Mariah Christine Wilson / France Paris Mission / Provo Missionary Training Center / 2005 N 900 E / Provo, UT 84604

Sister Mariah Christine Wilson
France Paris Mission
23, Rue Du Onze Novembre
78110 Le Vesinet
France

Mariah's farewell recital

2009-01-26T10:19:00.000-08:00

Aunt Mary talking. Thanks for letting me post on your blog, Mariah! Here are a few pics and a video from our recent roadtrip to help send you off on your mission.
To all the rest of you out there in cyberspace, watching Mariah play the piano is a joy! There is an emotion you can feel in her countenance that reflects how much she loves music. I hope these pics convey that.

Mariah delighted many of us by performing a recital of French music the Saturday evening before leaving for the MTC. Pardon the quality of the video. It can't possibly do justice to the live performance, which was beautiful, but perhaps gives a tiny idea of the talent and hardwork it took to accomplish this. We love you, Mariah. Thank you both for your gift of music and your testimony. You'll be a wonderful blessing to those waiting for you in France.

The lovely Mariah with Dow

and with Lynne.

Born of goodly parents.

oread farewell

2009-01-23T12:51:00.000-08:00

The time has come to say farewell;

And though my heart be heavy,

I promise still to remember ye

E'en though we say, "Farewell."

The flow'rs that bloom'd in Summer's sun

Have lost their fleeting glory

And all but died in Winter's chill;

and we must say, "Farewell."

So brief a time has come and gone

Since first we sang together;

But bittersweet is that music now

that we must say, "Farewell."

Now we must part, and fare ye well

in all that ye endeavor!

And last, I pray--fondly think of me,

Whene'er you say, "Farewell."

Singers will be performing this in the Spring although I had the honor to start it with them in December. The music is by Dan Forrest (Carol of Joy among others) and the poetry by Anthony Silvestri (who also wrote many of Eric Whitacre's lyrics that are on BYU's CDs including Her Sacred Spirit Soars, and Leonardo Dreams of His Flying Machine). I have said farewell so many times now. This particular farewell is one of the more joyous ones I have ever experienced. why? perhaps because I am going to be serving the Lord. I can't wait.

family... isn't it about Time?

2009-01-09T22:20:00.000-08:00

tonight was the last night all 9 Dow+Lynne Wilsons would be together until October 2013. if that.

so we had a feast. out came the china, the crystal and even the silver. and 5 courses. of course.

I suppose hosting, cheese courses and china are becoming quite regular at Place Wilson (there is hardly a day here without guests over for lunch or dinner); but tonight was different.

It was special because it was us. just the Wilsons.

We made predictions for each member at our next gathering in 2013. Married? with kids, 25 lbs heavier, doctor, author, retired?--the lists became quite ridiculous sometimes. I guess some were more realistic than others.

But that is not the fun of it. The fun is the snorting at Jane's lawyer-like decision, and falling off our chairs at Peter's wit. It is Adam telling Italian stories, and us responding in French. It is us knowing so well what they will say and we still laugh after they have said it. it is Hannah saying, "grot any groats?" it is the simple fact that we've all eaten too many groats. even for a horse. it is hannah's obsession with New Zealand. and Becky's british accent. it is mumzy's frugality. and Dad's loyalties. it is Adam ending words in -y. it is that a 1/4 of our Gallette des Rois has already been eaten... It is that peter eats as much food off my plate as his own. and that I correct his cutting of the cheeses. it is that abe lounges across 3 chairs for PDR--'post dinner reclination' while we start the dishes. it is that I am excused for dishes to make music with Hannah. it is the riotous laughter. We know so much about each other--good and bad--and love each other so much for it.

I could not ask for a more beautiful thing.

holidays 08: Mormon Battalion Trek

2008-12-30T21:28:00.000-08:00

Dec. 25th 2008

With every step, mud squelches between my blistered toes. The straps of my packs & blanket are cutting painfully into my shoulders. My bayonet wags uncomfortably every time I move my left leg. My musket is slipping in my right hand,

leaving red dye residue and moving old musicians' finger calluses to my palms. Under my raincoat/poncho/trash bag I am hunched over; trying to hold up my waterlogged pants and skirts wit

h my free hand. With every drop, I see rain creating ripples in the red lake that has invaded the desert. I try to stay away from the knee deep patches. I see only shrubs, mud and endless

rain in all directions. I ripped my jeans on the barbed wire we crossed years ago--or maybe this morning. The rationed crackers and cheese seem like years ago too. Water is dripping from my nose. merry christmas.

Dec. 26th 2008

Waking to a drum roll, I was surprised to see the sun had risen after monstrous storms at night. The ground is once again hard, cracked and dusty (I wish my shoes could dry like that). We made biscuits this morning for lunch in the dutch oven along with our cracked whea

t breakfast. There are now rocks to diversify the trail; we have come upon hills and

mountains. In fact, we are in a forest, a saguaro forest. It is unlike anywhere I have been or anything I have ever seen. There are all kinds of cactus--tree & teddy bear cholla, hedgehog, barrel and of course the saguaros. I ate 2 prickly pears today. Kevin and Peter even pulled out a four-wheeler to drive Becky, Jane and Grams when there strength waned! we sang and danced down the trails. We feasted on stew, Grams's rolls and watched the stars appear across the wilderness. We listened to Mormon Battalion stories by our three experts for 'date night' family home evening. What faith those men must have had. I am so grateful that I can honor them through retracing their steps. I miss doing music things all day and eating fresh food (out of non-larded tin!).

Dec 27th 2008

Nights are so cold here. I am wearing 8 layers, in a 'Cat's Meow' sleeping bag that I cocoon myself in (except fro a 2'' diameter breathing whole. There are blankets under me and on top of me, I am wearing 2 thick socks, hats and gloves. and I am Freezing! This morning, 2 families joined us to walk the day out. As I furiously clapped my hands and feet in front of th

e fire (my rubber soles are melted in several places), I saw the newcomers walk in through the fog. They were dressed in lovely pioneer dresses, clean and coiffed. I am suddenly vibrantly aware of my appearance: my hair has been braided for several days now, mudded down in place, and enough hair has come loose that I have grown a halo of frizz. I'm sure I smell horribly as I've been sitting in the fire most of the last three days. about half of my layers stay on permanently... at least I've been able to wash my face. someone calls my name and I look up... there is Sarah Lyman (good friend in my ward and dinner group the last semester). We both burst out laughing. What are the odds! our families are both crazy enough...? Needless to say, I felt our walk was even more enjoyable today.

Dec 28th 2008

Today is my birthday. Grams saved some dough last night and made cinnamon rolls in our dutch ovens. It must be a special day It is the sabbath too, and I say an extra long prayer of thanks to my Heavenly Father. We drove to a little branch to worship. The chapel is slightly bigger than our kitchen... but there is running water. ! We 12 smoky bodies (doubling the attendance) walk in, thinking we are early, and realize that they are closing their sacrament meeting. We stay for the second hour (provided by us trekkers telling stories) and I forget how much we smell of smoke. The Branch President offers to let us have our own sacrament meeting and we enthusiastically accept. It is so beautiful. I wanted to sing 'How Great Thou Art' over and over again. at least they had me lead the music. God is Gracious.

Dec 30th We finally arrived home. Everything is so clean and beautiful. there is my piano. and my violin. and a shower. Adam cooks a dinner that we are all drooling over: mahi-mahi spinach sauce over rice. and I have a bed to sleep on. There is hot water without warming a kettle over fire. I can change my clothes. I have shelter from the wind. I can turn on music in a stereo. I can write music on my laptop. I have a pillow. There is beauty all around. and I am again closer to my family.

Faith to be Healed and a Senior Recital

2008-12-06T11:46:00.000-08:00

I remember having this fantasy at age 9 or so about playing the piano in a huge concert hall when I was grown up, wearing a fancy green ball gown and wearing my long hair up in a crown of braids. Some prince would see me playing from far away and we would get married.... I have given up on that fantasy since most of my high school career I planned on going into violin professionally and was never very self confident in my appearance in a ball gown. and, who wants to marry a prince?!

Well, it's over. It wasn't like my first fantasy in any way--the concert hall was considerably smaller, no elaborate European architecture, no green pouffy dress, no long hair, no braids... no proposals--but it happened. It's strange not feeling relieved, sad or happy now that it's over. The whole thing was just a big miracle.

I have not been sick one day this whole semester or thanksgiving break. Until this Monday, when my throat completely closed off. The virus moved to my sinuses quickly and then to my head, giving me a low-grade fever Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. Apart from my dress rehearsal on Monday, I did not have any energy or strength to practice. I forced myself to put in at least a half hour per day (remember this is compared to the usual 4 hours per day... 17% of my usual).

As soon as it came on, I began praying with all my might, doing good scripture study and trying to sleep. but it didn't just float away. I realized that the spiritual gift of having 'faith to be healed' was not a natural gift to me as it is perhaps to my little brother, Abraham. After a particularly hard day at school, the fever had risen and taken me to the point of tears. I realized that I would like a priesthood blessing but I felt I couldn't ask for one until my faith was strengthened.

I read in Preach my Gospel that Faith was trust in the Lord (and the Atonement) as well as a confidence in his love for me. If in nothing else, I could full heartedly testify to my Father in Heaven that I had this kind of faith. I asked Him to increase it. I had sisters and brothers praying for me, parents, aunts & uncles, and surely a few friends to add to my faith.

The blessing did not pronounce immediate healing, but an assurance of a peace and comfort and the strength to perform. That was all I needed. I awoke yesterday feeling completely healed. I jumped up and told Camille it was a miracle. although I could feel my head still pounding, my throat and nose were clear. I could smell. and sing! after a few hours at school (and turning in a final), my temperature was rising, and my strength was waning again. I rested as well as I could until it was time to run up to perform.

My performance was in no way my best, but the audience was packed. I realized that they were not grading me, critiquing me, or judging me in any way. All of them loved me and hoped for the best for me. They each cared about me as a person--which meant it wouldn't matter whether or not I hit any notes at all. This comfort, my increased faith, (ibuprofen fever reducer!), and adrenaline gave me strength enough to play through everything.

As the applause died away after my closing piece, Liszt's Hungarian Rhapsody, I walked off stage and felt the weak state of my body want to collapse. I then realized how blessed I was. I keep thanking God. I then took more medication before singing in the next concert. I felt abundant power and spirit enter me as I testified and sang to the King of Kings, my Savior, Mary's babe, He in whose name all oppression shall cease. Let all within us praise His Holy Name. Oh fallen, Oh fearful, Oh friendless world, to you a Savior is born. Christ is the Lord. my healer. His Pow'r and Glory evermore proclaim! Hallelujah.

too grateful

2008-11-28T13:29:00.000-08:00

last night, I couldn't fall asleep for a few hours because I kept on thinking of more things that I had to thank my Heavenly Father for. I think it was in 7th grade when I realized that I have been way too blessed. I have just been given too much--too many good friends, family members, and too many opportunities. I was reading in the Doctrine and Covenants and realized that I have been given so much, so much must be required of me. It is stunning how significant that realization was. It was suddenly easy to be different, to stand up for myself, and to love living the gospel conspicuously. because I was much was required of me.

Later on, I realized that what I have been given is simply different than others and not really any more. But I certainly am grateful to be born in America, in Wisconsin, to a family who loves the Lord. To have had the opportunity to visit 24 countries, lived in 4. To have had teachers who have shaped my thinking, acceptance, writing and playing. To have had the means musical instruments. To have been in places all along the path of my life where Heavenly Father has set up stepping stones to prepare me for the life that I have been able to live.

It is wonderful to be old enough to realize some of the repercussions of my choices as a youth. and to see some of the benefits of things I have struggled with for seeming eternities. I have been too blessed.

I have been given everything I have ever wished for. So many of my dreams have come true. I have worked hard. but i have been blessed beyond anything I can imagine. I am excited to live life out--to struggle, to learn, to change. To learn all the ridiculous things that I am doing now and to have overcome them. or learnt from them.

To be molded in God's hands. or perhaps to have sung one of His melodies as His instrument.

CALLED

2008-10-26T15:52:00.000-07:00

It always works this way. Every time I am finally able to turn everything completely over to the Lord in peace, I start to get answers. Once I had peace of mind about choosing my major, I could then pray and could get confirmation. Once I could plan my life out both with a mission included and without, then I could get an answer to prepare. Once I humbled myself enough that I could accept a mission call anywhere (see patience post), the next morning I got my call. October 24th. It was a busy day. It was a busy week. but I was at peace. at rest in my heart.

I am called to serve in the Paris, France Mission.

Ever since we moved from France, I have wanted to serve there. I always hoped that I could brush up my French by returning and serving. I have kept in my heart French architecture, music, food, streets, gallantry. I have defended the French, I have loved the French. and I'm going back. I keep on laughing out loud. and giggling. and crying. It is too perfect. God is so good to me. Once I could finally give up the desire of my heart, it has been granted.

My Senior Recital (Dec. 5th 5:30!) is almost solely French composers: Poulenc, Ravel, Debussy, and Liszt. Music. France. the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

I'm going on a mission.

Patience

2008-10-23T22:18:00.000-07:00

Sunday night, my roommate Caitlyn Savage and I stayed up into the wee hours of the morning talking about... stuff. not even 'boys' stuff but hopes, dreams, aspirations, strivings, laughter, dedication and love. My favorite discussions are those that stay on my mind for days or weeks and this one fit into that category with pride. I set a goal with Cait that I would not do anything to start the week before I had studied patience. So I did. Preach my Gospel says that patience is not angry, frustrated, or anxious but it is "to hold up under pressure and [be] able to face adversity calmly and hopefully." After praying about it, the stress miraculously vanished from my life. I have decided never to be anxious, worried, or stressed again!

although I realize that this goal is slightly impossible, it has worked miracles so far this week. all the stress miraculously swoooshed away with the cold wind this week. I have needed a little extra patience with piano practice, performances, myself, and an awaiting mission call. Patience has somehow seeped into my life and the fears that I had about serving a mission suddenly flew away.

Monday morning, I got a message telling me that my call had been sent (I think it meant issued). I bounded out of bed (Camille can testify), threw open the windows (actually this part is fictional but definitely possible), and shouted to the world that I was going on a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. It suddenly didn't matter where my primary assignment was, or how difficult the whole affair would be. because I... I (mariah???) had been called. Called to Serve. and I have the patience to wait for a call an extra few days if it gets stuck in the mail. and the patience that practice will slowly cumulate. and that I will finish papers in time. and that I can slowly refine my character even when I make mistakes. and I have faith that all will work out. and. I'm going on a mission.

Praise

2008-09-20T19:43:00.001-07:00

This week, I played for a faculty luncheon where the Vice President of BYU spoke on Celebration. He pointed out that while we mourn with those who mourn, we don't often rejoice with those who rejoice. CS Lewis explains that praise is merely an outward expression of the Joy one feels in his heart.

Compliments, kind gestures, hymns, supporting words are all forms of praise whether they are to our God or to each other.

"Let all my works be Praise" is my favorite line from My Shepherd Will Supply My Need (we have been rehearsing this for devotional on Tuesday). I have always hoped to solely praise the Lord with the musical talents He has blessed me with; I need to extend that praise to all my thoughts, words and actions.

The roses creeping up the side of my house that fill the air with perfume and beauty are a reminder to me of the Creator. They even praise his name. why can't we all?

last pleasure-travel for 2008

2008-08-27T11:32:00.001-07:00

Although I am obsessed with museums, lookout towers, historical monuments & other touristy things; my favorite thing to do while traveling is simply to walk around town. The architecture, the people, the roads, the street vendors, the animals, the lights, the cars. Somehow, I feel as if I have taken a part in the culture of the new town.

We recently got back from touring NYC, Boston & Lexington, MA, Dartmouth, NH and Sharon, VT. The art museums that I got to spend hours in made my eyes& heart overjoyed and the airplane ticket worth it (MFA & Gardner in Boston, MET & folk in NYC--Gardner, although smaller, was perhaps my favorite). The historical walking tours in NYC, Boston, and Harvard made it an educational experience as history was made alive and I could be more appreciative and enchanted with the cities around me. The cathedrals, churches, and temples made me want to worship all the days of my life.

... but apart from those fabulous touristy things to do, I will always remember walking in each city. gobbling up everything I could see, hear, smell, touch...

NYC. I have been here several times and always loved it. this time, it reminded me more and more of Europe with it's smell of smoke, urine, and gorgeous architecture piled together. walking alone down Broadway in the morning, the lights of Times Square, Columbus Circle, the eternal construction, the markets, the vendors. I spent a day with Grams (finishing up her mission there) going to the local markets, running up and down streets through the poring rain, diving through metro stops, exploring danger-zone-convents, and giving away a French Book of Mormon. On our last day there, Peter and I spent a while walking up and down 5th Ave and stopping at the Lindt, NBA, and street vendors. mmmm.

MA, NH, VT. One morning while staying in our Lexington B&B, I got up early to walk around for an hour or two. The peaceful morning was refreshingly sweet with dew... I realized how much I love and miss the greenery in the grass, trees, hills, forests. California and Utah are a little dry. Boston is clean, open and inviting for a city. It was wonderful walking up and down the commons, the gardens, making way for ducklings, and supporting the Friday market (I think we bought 7 cartons of blueberries), and the seafood :) The greenery and the colonial-style architecture was so blatant and different from everywhere I've lived but I loved it. It has its own charm and unique spin full of history and I would love to come back.

and Bookstores. I forgot how much fun it is to curl up in a little nook and read. and I loved the organization for Harvard's COOP: "Old, Curious & Cool," "Summer pleasure reading," "kids books for adults..."

Conducting

2008-08-08T23:10:00.000-07:00

I feel beautiful when I conduct because I am part of the music. thinking, singing, moving, feeling, and being touched by the music. and this week, I had the honor to do this for a whole evening. and in one of the most beautiful cathedrals on this side of the atlantic.

Our program had a restoration theme, titled 'Come, Come Ye Saints' with speakers between each set, & organ, violin and flute when appropriate.

Redeemer of Israel, The Morning Breaks, Joseph Smith's First Prayer, Praise to the Lord, Sine Nomine / For All the Saints, A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief, Praise to the Man (with congregation), and Come, Come Ye Saints (leroy Robertson).

It has to be slightly overwhelming: choosing music, photocopying music, practicing music, memorizing music, conducting music, getting binders, doing warm-ups, booking the place, the time, the piano, the mic, flyers and posters, electronic ads, getting pianists & organists, choosing speakers in between sets, choosing uniforms, standing order, refreshments... but it is worth that and much more. and I have been helped so much by Brooke, Liz, Lynne, and Mal.

Even though I know all of this music so well, I can still notice new shapes and meaning while performing. The Spirit of my Lord can enter into my heart as well and testify to me of the goodness of Jesus Christ my Savior, the Restoration of His church on Earth, and of his comfort in times of troubles.

a Strange Encounter

2008-08-06T14:24:00.000-07:00

I took a different route home for the sole reason of exploring. After enjoying the heat, wind, and view enough, I started for home via the train tunnel.

I slowed down considerably as there were crowds crossing through. A few bikers swerved at the exit to go around 2 big suitcases and a woman standing in the exit. I was in no rush, so swung off my bike to offer help.

She was an older woman, with wispy curly blonde hair and watery eyes, very short and very round. An elderly gentleman hopped off his bicycle just behind me. I took the biggest suitcase (I hadn't seen the handles were broken), as the gentleman started for the roller carry-on. She awkwardly scrambled to take her multicolored purse off of the suitcase. Then she started walking out of the tunnel. With a quick glance at the gentleman, we followed. The only thing she said was 'citibank.'

The older woman was waddling away with her multicolored purse, and the old man with the roller, his bike and helmet, and I, left clambering up in the rear with my bike, helmet, and fatty-no-handle-suitcase. through classy down-town Palo Alto. It was a sight.

"Citibank is on University" ... 'this is University,' I assured her... but we still crossed the street a few extra times before we found citibank. All this while, my friend (the gentleman) and I kept glancing at each other, commenting on everything with facial expressions.

Once at Citibank, we were still confused as to where she was staying. I stumbled in with my bike in tow when my friend offered so graciously, "I don't live too far from here, and I could bring down a vehicle to take you to a hotel or anything-"

to which she answered "actually, I do need to go to Wallgreens, and a Burger King or something like that to eat." We set down her suitcases by a chair in the vacant Citibank when she said, "Well, should I wait here?"

I felt so much for my friend as we came out, both hoping she had a place to stay and thanking each other for our help. I kept stammering about his generosity as he left me absorbed in my thoughts for the ride home.

Was he really going to come back and take her to dinner? with no thanks? How much would she trespass on my friend? What was she doing here? in Palo Alto? how did she even get her luggage off of the train? does she know anyone here? why did she have to go to Citibank? Was she running away? Was she a grand duchess, used to being served? was she going to sleep on the marble floor? is she here doing background checks? did she sneak out of a nursing home in San Fran? is she connected to the walker Grams found in NYC outside the convent?

my arm hurts.

apple magic

2008-07-31T11:50:00.000-07:00

Two weeks ago, the power cord to my laptop stopped working (I only have 40 minutes of battery as it is). I kept my computer shut for 2 days before I realized that I can't live without my 'Babs' PowerBook G4.

After researching prices online both used and new, I was talking to my father who decided to go to the apple store that moment (he may have know of the magic there). Of course, there happens to be an apple store just down the road. But it was 9:40 on a Saturday night! Apple, of course, was open that night until 10.

When I get downtown Palo Alto, there is a long line outside the Apple store... why? perhaps they wanted to take lessons & get the new iPhone. I went to the front of the line and asked tentatively if I could come in? The store was closing in 10 minutes now, and I really needed to make my purchase. I thought I'd look around and find a worker to direct me ... once through the doors though, I realized that every single person in the full room was wearing a bright blue apple shirt.

I walked up to the worker closest and didn't get a chance to say 2 words when he left me- 'wait here.' He came back a split second later (did he apparate??) with a new power adaptor box. I tried to tell him then that mine was the older model--but he had already thought of that. He said kindly, "Why don't I take care of you tonight." He took my old, dirty, dysfunctional adaptor and gave me a perfect new one. easy. perfect. great! free?!

I stammered many thanks and left, laughing.

fears

2008-07-24T21:08:00.000-07:00

I used to think that I didn't fear anything.

later, I realized that I do fear for the safety and protection of my family, especially my younger sisters.

Yesterday, I thought that I would go exploring after work. So, I took a long bike ride (just a little longer & hillier than expected) and parked over in Stanford campus to go exploring on foot. It was a beautiful time to reflect and think (despite a heavy backpack on) and the trails, flowers, bridges were beautiful. I need to make an arrangement of my Heavenly Father loves me. On my way back, the pathway was quite deserted. I don't really know why I wanted to do this, but I really wanted to climb a tree. I have not climbed a tree in many many years, and have an irrational fear of climbing on them.

[ok, Peter, my little brother, just threw a banana peel across the room towards mallory through a half shut door]

so, I found a tree that followed the slope of a hill so the fall was never more than 6 feet and forced myself to climb it. yes, it was a frightening, and yes, I left my laptop and backpack at the bottom, and yes, I got poked by miniature thorny branches, and yes, I got stuck once. but the whole point is, I felt so good after conquering a mini-fear.

I remember being afraid of heights when I was a little girl. Unfortunately, as sight seeing was a huge part of my childhood, I climbed many turrets, cathedral bell towers, fortress ramparts, and mountains. I remember making a very conscious decision while climbing a precariously steep staircase on the edge of a tower that I would not be afraid of heights. It was done with tongue-biting and no looking down for a year, but since then, I have not been afraid of heights.

I just want to find more fears and conquer them. or maybe also increase in faith.

Down By the Salley Gardens

down by the salley gardens, my love and I did meet.

she passed the salley gardens with little snow-white feet.

she bid me take love easy, as the leaves grow on the trees.

but I, being young and foolish, with her did not agree.

in a field down by the river, my love and I did stand

and on my leaning shoulder, she placed her snow-white hand.

she bid me take life easy, as the grass grows on the weirs.

but I was young and foolish, and now am full of tears.

a good samaritan

2008-07-10T20:30:00.000-07:00

I always pray when I start to drive. anywhere. you'd think that after 4 years, I'd be a little more confident. I often pray when I ride my bike, but not always for safety. Today, I was hit by a car while biking home through downtown Palo Alto. Don't get worried, it was as minor as it could possibly be. Shortly after I had turned down Ramona street, a mini-van came backing out of a driveway hidden by the parked cars right into me. As soon as I saw it, I swerved hard, but still, my front wheel hit the car as she braked and I fell over. My scream (an alarming sensation, I haven't screamed for 1.5 years) must have alerted the driver to stop because she couldn't have felt me hit her.

I of course jumped up saying, 'I'm so sorry, I didn't see you backing up!' The van lady kept saying,'I'm so sorry, I didn't see you! are you all right?' 'yes, I'm just fine, just fine...' The lady crossing a nearby sidewalk had run over, also anxious about my well-being. As she guided my to the sidewalk, I touched my face and realized that tears had spilled across my face just about as fast as my heart went from normal to frenzied heart rate. I kept on apologizing and thanking them ('mam'--when did I start saying that?) insisting that I was all right. Anxious lady from the crosswalk insisted that I rest a block away in her office while she could get me a drink and let me sit in the cool. She let me stay as long as I'd like after I'd dabbed my bloody scrapes and had some water. I did not realize how far I was from relaxing until I tried to relax. but, after a few minutes, my heart rate decreased and I could continue on my way home.

People are so nice! Perhaps I should have higher expectations of 'people.' It has been one of my favorite things to see people help each other out in moments of crisis. or minor bike crashes. I'm sure I would have been just fine if no one would have talked to me. Their support, comfort and --love I guess, brought peace, comfort and safety to me.

The Lark in the Clear Air

Sweet thoughts are in my mind

And my soul soars enchanted

When I hear the sweet lark sing

in the clear air of the day.

For a tender, loving smile

to my hope has been granted,

and tomorrow she shall hear

all my fond heart would say.

Yosemite

2008-07-07T22:07:00.000-07:00

Over the 4th, we went backpacking in Yosemite. The family on this trip consisted of Mom&Dad, Jane & I, Abe, and Hannah & Rebekah. We dearly missed Adam and Peter... and the weight they could have carried. In my opinion, the best part about it was the time we spent together and

the beauty of being in nature.

As expected in camping, sleeping quarters were cramped. but after a restless night, I was not expected to wake up to a 'quick! you've gotta check out this bear!' yes... he must have been the one walking around in the middle of the night. As far as other animals, we saw 2 brown bears, 1 black bear, a handful of deer

and ground squirrels and only a very few humans.

Many of our trails crossed huge patches of burnt trees. The only really beautiful thing about this was that the undergrowth in each of these patches was taking over splendidly. I am so glad that God builds his ruined places and will heal all hurts, and in some cases, given two-fold.

I loved being submerged in nature and with time to reflect and praise God. It also gave me quality time with each

of my siblings where I could discuss things from repentance to prayer to Lord of the Rings to controlling thought patterns.

As we all do when out of our element, I learned several things about myself or at least was reminded of a few. 1. I love climbing on rocks.

Abe, Hannah and I dropped

off our bags a few times to scramble up to the top of different rock outcroppings. 2. I don't mind playing in mud and being dirty, but I love having clean hands. 3. I love water! ... another thing that I take for granted far too often. Finding streams always raised the morale, and when the water supply ran short, we were all

grumpy.

4. A view is always worth the hike. Nature brings so much peace. I love being immersed in it.

Cockles and Mussels

In Dublin's fair city, where girls are so pretty, I first set my eyes on sweet Molly Malone as she wheeled her wheel barrow through streets broad and narrow, Crying Cockles and Mussels, Alive Alive Oh!

She was a fishmonger, but sure 'twas no wonder, for so were her father and mother before and they each wheeled their barrows though streets broad and narrow, crying Cockles and Mussels, Alive Alive Oh!

She died of a fever, and no one could save her, and that was the end of sweet Mollie Malone; her ghost wheeled her barrow through streets broad and narrow, crying Cockles and Mussels, Alive Alive Oh!

Livvy

2008-07-03T07:28:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Livvy (Olivia, who I nanny for) again smiled and laughed as I got her out of her crib. I should rephrase that, laughing I'll describe as excited kicking, hard breathing and bright eyes.

This week, on one of our walks, we went in a different direction and I explored a beautiful church. All major doors were locked to the chapel, but I found a back door open that I sneaked into. It was deserted but flooded in warm colored light from the many stained glass windows. Because of the carpeting and cushions, the acoustics are hardly like a stone cathedral, but we still sang a few songs.

Much of our time together is spent singing lots of songs from hymns to Patty Cake. I decided that I should memorize some more of my Irish folk songs--I know so many tunes but not many words. This week I memorized 'The Castle of Dromore'

The October Winds Lament around the Castle of Dromore

Yet peace is in it's lofty halls, my loving treasure store

Though autumn leaves may droop and die, a bud of spring you are. [C]

Bring no ill wind to hinder us, my helpless babe and me.

Dread spirit of Blackwater Banks, Clan Owens' wild banshee.

and Holy Mary pitying us in heav'n for grace doth sue. [C]

Take time to thrive, my rose of hope in the garden of Dromore.

Take heed, young eagle, till your wings are feathered, fit to soar.

A little rest and then the world is full of work to do.

[C]: Sing hush-a-bye loo, la loo lo lan, sing hush-a-bye loo la lo.

novelties of PA

2008-06-23T22:00:00.000-07:00

The last time that I lived at home was 2+ years ago. Even then, it was only for 3 months. So I am being reintroduced to California--that is Palo Alto, CA. It is quite an experience. There are currently 10 people living here. I sleep in the attic (my head will probably soon have a few permanent dents from the slanting ceilings). Since the ten of us go to different places each day, we each try to ride bicycles. We have many shapes and sizes for all--my lot is a racing bike. at least it's a woman's. My saddle sores are finally gone and I do enjoy zipping along the roads and not counting to 3 at stop signs. I don't cook my own meals. Breakfast (Oats/flax MWF, Eggs TTh, Pancakes S) is supposed to be served when the first member of the household leaves and dinner regularly includes a few guests, fresh bread, and homemade dishes with produce from our garden or the local organic posh stores. of course fresh fruit, nuts, vegetables and reversed osmosis water are available all day. And I nanny all day.

I'm set on thinking that my perspective and mindset as a child must have been opposite than that of my little Californian siblings :). Everything in CA seems to be a fad. But it is wonderful, the climate is only too perfect to walk / bike ride every day and grow a fabulous garden year round. Or maybe it's just that I am now come to a stress-free and academic-free, even music lesson-free environment in disbelief. maybe I've just been in studying for too many years. freedom. maybe that's all that's a novelty to me.